Last kiss: Our mistakes Chapter 19 - Mzansi Stories

Monday, November 2

Mahlatse Ramatseba

Last kiss: Our mistakes Chapter 19

"That knowing, is better than wondering. That waking, is better than sleeping. And
that even the biggest failure, even the worst, most intractable mistake, beats the hell out of never trying." M.Grey
They have said have faith, every mistake is forgiven but forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting. I am one of those people, I forget the world doesn't function/ revolve around me. Maybe that is my biggest downfall but I admit to my flaws, anyway Gcobani had proven to me what I've always known. He wasn't mine, he was never mine to begin with we were lessons to each other and maybe I am that girl, you know the bitch that makes the guy ruthless and maybe he is the guy that damaged me uninternationally but he did anyway . I took a vow in that taxi to never ever contact Gcobani Lombatha. I arrived home and my father was watching cricket, I greeted and he told me to watch with him.
Me"Not a cricket fan remember?"
Dad"Why do you hate it?"
Me"Don't hate it, just don't understand it"
He laughed at me then told me to sit down. He explained who was who and what they did, by the time the Proteas were batting I could understand.
Me"I take what I said back"
Dad"I told you"
we bonded over a game of cricket, for the first time in a long time my father and I laughed together without Sanele, Mama or Anelisa. He even wanted to know about my future plans, he asked about everything and I mean everything which was funny.
Me"Tata"
He smiled at me.
Me"Think I want to move in with Anelisa next year"
Dad"Why? "
Me"I need to find myself"
Dad"Were you even lost?"
Me"Not in that sense but I want life outside PE, I feel trapped"
Dad"Trapped? "
Me"Yes" "Allow me to take next year off, if I fail then I move back home"
Dad"Fail what?"
Me"Being independent"
Dad"So if you fail, you come back home"
I nodded
Dad"One year, but you leave here only if you find a job or a school, mna no Mamakho wont support you and Lisa will need your monthly contribution"
silence
Dad"Yeva? "
Silence
Dad"Nmmu is waiting for you"
Me"Let me go study"
I know my father thought what he said would discourage me, instead it motivated me even more and after failing my trials I needed to bury myself in my books and appear that newspaper!
Dad"False. Evidence. Appears. Real"
Me"I am not scared"
Dad"Then what "
Me"You'll never understand"
My finals began and I can honestly say I was struggling, the first 3 papers I cried myself to sleep. My mom would wake me up everyday at 3am to study and she bought me bought me cans of Play energy drink. Zola and I broke up, the funny part I still found time for a new boyfriend but he wasn't a distraction behlale Joburg yena, he was 5 years older, had a kid and a stable job. Think I forgot to mention he was my cousin(Asi) ex boyfriend, it was meant to be just a fling but he said all the right things. He called during weekends because my phone was off during the week, he bought me 30rand which to me was a lot and he sent me money. Was my love being bought? it honestly didn't matter because he was providing things that Gcobani couldn't. With this relationship my cousin and I drifted, but not drastically because she claimed not to care. I decided to consult Mandisi because I respected his opinion.
Mandisi"Mtchanam I won't even lie, you will get hurt kule. He could be using you to get back at lo "
Me"what if he isn't "
Mandisi"Mfondini you will regret this"
The next day I was studying when Phiwe called, thats the new guy. He called almost everyday, which was annoying at times.
Phiwe"Who is Thando?"
Me"He is my Friend, why what happened? "
Phiwe"I don't like the way he speaks to you"
Me"Phi? what did he say?"
Phiwe"This boy is disrespecting me, I am your man but he is busy addressing you as babe"
Me"He has a girlfriend"
Phiwe"He wouldn't like it if I spoke to his girlfriend like that"
Me"Ngoku what should I do?"
Phiwe"Remove him, I won't be disrespected by little boys"
silence
"Give me your Facebook pin"
Regrets

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