Broken Vows - Diary ya ga Obonolo Chapter 115 - Mzansi Stories

Thursday, October 15


Broken Vows - Diary ya ga Obonolo Chapter 115


DYGO 115
I must have lost myself in the Lord's presence, I didn't remember standing up and getting into our bed. I was woken up by my husband's arms around me. I remembered that I left him downstairs sleeping on the sofas. I turned and hold him and dose off with so much peace that he was right beside me.

I really overslept because when I woke up, it was 9:30, Kevin was already awake. He was not in the bedroom though. I thought maybe he was making us breakfast, since he promised that he was not going to work. So we were going to spend the whole Saturday together. Just the two of us.

I woke up, made our bed and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face. I was really hungry since I never finished my supper last night.

I went downstairs. The house was too quiet. I called on my husband, thinking maybe he was outside. No one answered, I opened the curtains and went to check the garage. Yooo, there was only one car, my car, Kevin was gone.

Really now? Where did he go so early? I thought well, maybe he rushed shopping and will be back. I went to check if he took a bath or showered. I got upstairs and yep, it seemed my husband really took a bath.

I took my phone and called him. The phone rang twice then he picked up on the third ring.

Lavo: " Hey Bobo, o setse o tsogile?, I didn't want to wake you up, hence I left without saying goodbye."

Nna: " Goodbye for what now? Kevin where are you? And where are you going?"

Lavo: " I'm passing Southgate, heading to Vereeniging, I have things I needed to take care of. I didn't finish them off maobane."

Nna: "Please don't tell me you are going to work!"

Lavo: "Unfortunately I am. I will see you later. I got go. Love u."

Just before I could ask him further questions, he just hung up the phone. Yaa neh, motho a ka go fetogela bonolo fela. This was clearly not the husband I married. His man was becoming inconsiderate, selfish and unavailable for us, for me.

He knew very well that last night I was unhappy about him cancelling our dinner and a couple of things that happened. He rocked up ko ntlung a le pop drunk, he never got the chance to explain all that, yet, he decided to wake up , bathe and leave? Not even trying to wake me up and explain himself and everything that happened. He owed me an explanation, yet he didn’t deem it necessary or important to give me one.

The man I married would have made sure of that. Ha ele enwa yena, ha ke mo tsebe at all. I was really getting worried. Something was happening.

I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, something was not right but I can't quiet figure out what that feeling was about. My husband has become distant, he was working late on a regular basis , he was suddenly too busy for his family with no explanation. This was not the marriage I had before 2011. Ka nnete Kevin o a fetoga.

I went back to the kitchen, made my breakfast. I went outside ate my breakfast alone. I was really deep in thoughts about what was happening to my husband. I kept asking myself, was he overworked?, was he stressed?

If he was going through "some shit", like he said last night, hobaneng a nkwalela ka ntle and not discussing with me? I can't believe he disregarded my desires to spend time with him this weekend. He just put working a priority over our marriage. Ka nnete this was so unlike him.

I remembered one time we spoke about putting our marriage first before anything else. We spoke about not being halfhearted when it comes to our marriage .We said our marriage must always be our greatest priority under God or else it becomes easy to completely be off track in our lives. We always kept it that way until the kids came along and became a lot more complex but we were striking the balance.

I had to understand that both of us had to work to support the family especially my husband with two demanding jobs. Plus he needed to also do all those other stuff like staying healthy, being in church and have contact with friends and family. Maybe my husband was overwhelmed. Honestly how can he do all those things without violating what our top priority should be? Somehow along the line, he would get to a point where he would be neglecting something or someone. It was clear that I was the one being neglected and being compromised in all the things and people he had to please

I was really hurt. I thought, ooh well he was gone, sitting here and crying, won't help me.

It’s the twins’ birthday on the 25th March, so I must just go do final shopping. I thought kana Ole wanted to talk, maybe ke kopane le ena before my shopping. Besides, I was left with buying stuff for the party packs. So I would just Google people who specializes in providing that service, go meet up with them to come up with ideas. That won't take me longer.

I remembered it was Nkosimphile's birthday. Yes the 12th March .I thought of Fiks and Nkosimphile, what they were up to in Nigeria. She said they were going to celebrate Nkosi's first birthday in Nigeria .Obinna insisted that his parents were dying to meet his firstborn child. So since she and Obinna were working things out, she agreed to go to Nigeria. She took a month's leave to go there since the 4th of March, they were coming back on the 18th March. I was happy that they will be back for the twins’ birthday.
Since she left, she hasn't contacted me. Well, she always say whenever she goes to Nigeria, she would phone me with her Nigerian contact number, but she never does.

I snapped out of my trail of thoughts.

I took a bath, finished dressing up. I called Omo to check how they slept. She told me that everything was ok. I told her that I will come see them later. As I was busy talking to her, I remembered that Ole slept over her place. I asked her to put him on the phone.
I arranged with him to meet up in two hours. I was rushing to Foksburg then we could meet somewhere in Rivonia. He insisted we meet ko Melrose arch. I agreed about the venue and said I will see him at 13:00

I finished off and left for Foksburg. I didn't waste time. I sorted out the party packs and everything I needed and headed back. It was 12:30 when I got to Melrose Arch. I decided to do therapy shopping. Moya waka o ne ole ko tlase. I was really hurt by my husband's actions. I promised myself not to let it spoil my day. I was really going to call a serious AFM (annual family meeting) tonight. We have to talk. We haven’t spoken about hardcore stuff. We haven’t done a stock taking on our marriage for a while now. So maybe this would be a perfect time to have AFM. Raise our concerns, review our marriage constitution, raise complaints and compliments. Just nje, to see if we were still on the right track. After yesterday’s stunts, I worried about us and our marriage.
I decided to focus on my date with my little brother, who seemed beaten up. Who really needed to talk to me about something very important?

I must have been shopping for long, because, Olefile called to say she was at JB's corner waiting for me. I was already done. So I headed to JBs , I spotted him from far, my yellow bone brother he was wearing a white addidas shirt and white caps. He also saw me coming, a emisa letsogo gore ke mmone. I parked close to JB, so I went to where he was seated, asked him to order for me something to eat, I was starving. I left to take my shopping bags to the car so that I could relax.

I got back and hugged him properly and kissed him. Yoo ngwanakogae, He has really grown. He was taller than I and gained some few Kg’s. We greeted and spoke about work and life in general. He was really doing well. He said his life was so good. Everything was going according to his plans and God's. Hmm I was just proud of him

Ole: "O kae abuti KK (that’s how he calls Kevin)"

Nna: "O ile tirong, a kere o a itse di weekends o ya Vaal."

Ole: "Ija, o go bolaisa bodutu tlhe, every weekend? He must rest sometimes. I always tell him gore I can go help out ko Makoota on Saturdays that I was free, like today. Besides, Mringo is always there and he is the best General manager the whole week, what can one day do to hurt him if he doesn’t go to Vaal?"

Yoo, my brother has really grown up. He reasons like a man. And he had a point. Why was Kevin traveling to his business every Saturday yet, the whole week Mringo is running everything smoothly. I understand he has to oversee the business, but it shouldn't be an every weekend trip, the whole day? Hai.

Mringo Khone, has been looking after MAKOOTA from the very beginning and he was really doing a good job. I really must speak to Kevin, to consider going to Makoota at least two weekends a month ( preferably first weekend and last weekend of the month or on fortnights).

Ole gave me an idea. This was perfect. It will allow us more time with my husband. We will at least have two weekends with him so that we can bond and spend time together. Yoo it was as if I could kiss Ole. Imagine, one weekend it will be me and Husbee alone, the other weekend it will be family weekend then the remaining two weekends he can go to work and see his friends…..
That could work. It’s a topic for the planned AFM tonight. I thought.

Ole disturbed my trail of thoughts. I almost forgot we were there to talk about him not my husband.

Nna: "Askies ngwana papa, you just said something I never thought of. I will speak to Kev. Thank you. Ok Enough about my husband. Wa re go tlhaga eng mo bophelong ba gago maar Shimmy, oops sorry Malome Ole?"

Ole: "Aus Noli, I'm not going to sit here, beating around the bush. I am going to say it like it is.

Nna: “Bua dear, I'm all ears, I promise not to judge nor be hard on you.”

Ole: "As I already said maobane, my girlfriend is pregnant, we just find out two weeks ago. We were excited when we found out. Yesterday morning, she sent me an sms saying I should not tell my family as yet because she was contemplating abortion again."
Nna: "Olefile what are you telling me? Abort again? I don't mean to judge you ngwana papa, mare that’s just reckless. What happened to condoms mare? And second pregnancy? This girlfriend of yours, doesn’t she know anything about birth-control? Gaaaaa! You are both irresponsible.

Anyway, what happened with the first pregnancy? Why did she abort? Were there complications or what?"

Ole: “No sis, we were both not ready for such responsibility. We just met back then and we were both studying. She told me she was not ready, and I supported her. We decided to abort."

Nna: "When was this Ole? How did you guys feel about it?"

Ole: “Aish sis, it was exactly during that time you suffered a miscarriage. I couldn't tell you then, because I didn't want to be insensitive. I told Omo fela and she promised not to tell anyone."

Nna: "Hai Olefile, 2009? Yoo, how far along was she when she terminated?"

Ole: “She was a little over 13 weeks. Exactly the same time you had a miscarriage. She terminated a week after. I'm sorry sis. I know I was very reckless and we killed an innocent child. But it was best for us that time. This time I want to have the baby, I want to be a father. I really do."

Olefile got so emotional that I had to stand up and go sit next to him, and comforted him. You could see the pain on his face, he really wanted the baby. I just rubbed his back telling him everything will be ok.

Nna: "So what are her reasons to terminate this time? Especially if you say you want the baby? "
Ole: "Sesi, we did a home pregnancy test together. When we saw the two lines, we were over the moon. We even set an appointment with the Dr to confirm the pregnancy, we were planning to go together on the 25th March. We were both excited. We were looking forward to find out how long away she was and maybe the sex.

On Thursday she slept over my place and we were still talking about looking forward to raising our child together. As I said we were planning to tell both our families soon after the Dr’s appointment. She was looking forward to go home to tell her mom, and I told her I was going to ask you to tell mama and everyone ka the twins birthday party. Yesterday morning I was shocked to get her message."

Ole handed me his phone. The message read: “Hey Olgee, I thought long and hard about this pregnancy. I don't think I can carry this baby further. It’s complicated. But I am thinking of terminating again. Please don't tell anyone about this and please don't pressure me to keep it. It’s best this way. Trust me. Xoxo, Love you"

Yooo, this was a tough one.

DYGO 115 cont.

Why does Tshego want to terminate this pregnancy, what could be so complicated? Really. Olefile was really hurt, I could see from his eyes and face, the deep hurt he was experiencing. This was not fair. She must at least tell Ole the reason why she suddenly feels like terminating the pregnancy, especially after making him believe he was going to be a father. Can she be so selfish? Yoo, she was really brave, I must say.

I really need to try to get through to her and maybe, after I can share my pain of miscarriage and the scar I still hold due to that, she might change her mind. Besides, she's been through the first termination, which alone, must have been painful. She really can't go through this again. E le gore, o how old this girl to be terminating pregnancies? I thought to myself.

Nna: “Ole, how old is Tshego?

Ole: “Sesi, who is Tshego? Or you mean my girlfriend? She is 28. I know she's 5 years older than me, but I love her so much sis. I want to be the father to her child. I am ready, I am financially stable, I have a place of my own, I could look after both of them. I know she is scared because she is not financially stable but I can afford both of us."

Nna: "Yoo, she is way too older than you tlhe? O le Ben10 ngwana ko gae. Straight. Anyway, I guess what is done is done. Well in our eyes you will always be young. if you love her that much, I guess we should accept that you are an adult and we just have to accept that you will have to live your life.

So are you sure you want to take such responsibility? Of being a father?

Ole: “Yes sesi, I really want to be a father. With all my heart. I don’t know what would happen to me should she terminates this one. I really want her to keep the baby. Even if she can let me adopt the baby straight after birth, ke tla ikgodisetsa ena.

Nna: “Yoo Ole, I had no idea you feel this way. Aish. Try to convince her to keep the baby. Firstly find out her reasons, maybe it’s something serious. Then try to work with whatever is pushing at terminate.

Ole: “No sesi, I asked and begged and pleaded, she asked me not to do that. She said it was her body and her decision alone. What must I do ausi?

Nna: “Yaa neh! That’s a tough one. I was thinking that, maybe you can give me her numbers, ke leke go buisana le ena, woman to woman, maybe I can persuade her to change her mind."

Ole: “Aish, I'd really appreciate it sesi. I'm going to fetch her tomorrow afternoon, remember I told you she went home. So, ke tla utlwa gore o santse a batla to abort the baby naa. Maybe she will come back from home a fetotse monagano. But if she hasn't, I will call you ke nale ene and you can talk to her."

That sounded like a good idea. We agreed that I will try to speak to her and we will take it from there. For now, it will be between the three of us. I told Ole gore, if re ka palelwa ke go mo thibela go ntsha mpa, a amogele. One thing for sure, we won't force her to keep the baby she doesn't want. Alternatively, I will advise her to carry the baby and let Ole raise the baby without her. Mama was lonely ko gae, she would make a good grandmother. I just smiled on the thought of mama raising Olefile’s child. Well, I didn’t want to count the chickens before they hatch. But I was going to try. For my little brother’s sake.

Ole: haa sesi, why are you laughing! O le mong jaana, Ke eng? "

Nna: "I had a silly thought. Ke nagana gore if Tshego want to abort the baby, re mo convince a tswele pele ka pregnancy. We will look after her till she gives birth and as soon as she gives birth, a go fe ngwana, then mama would gladly raise him or her. That’s why I was laughing. What does she do for a living?"

Ole: "hai wena sesi you make me laugh , your imaginations always run wild. Yaa but le nna I thought about that. Ausi why are you busy calling my girlfriend Tshego? I will end up reserving that name for my unborn baby. Oh, she works at a Bank in Vereeniging."

Just as I was about to ask Ole about his girlfriend's real name, his phone rang. He just said, speak of the devil. He stood up to speak to her.

It was 14:30, yoo, time went so fast, Kevin hasn't even phoned or smsed or whatsapp me. I decided to check up on him

I dialed his phone number. It rang twice and he answered. I just asked him where he was, what time was he planning to be home and told him I was going to Omo to see the kids. I also asked him if I should just bring them home with me or we will fetch them after church as planned. He just said it was my call. He was ok with any decision. He said he was on his way to Kgosi's place.

What? Is this man for real? After maobane, he decided to knock off early and go to see his friend instead of coming straight home? He can’t be serious shame.

I had a lump in my heart. I was really hurt by my husband's latest behavior. I just couldn't understand why he was treating me like this? What happened to us communicating our feelings? If I didn’t knew him better, I'd think he was avoiding me. He was running away from explaining his new attitude and the stunt he played last night. Coming home drunk and all.

Nna: "Lavo, for how long are you planning to keep running away from me?”

Lavo: "What are you talking about?"

Nna: "Since yesterday you have avoided at all costs to be with me. We had plans, which you didn't honour. I let them pass. You came home at 22h00, drunk, you treated me like piece of rubbish, and slept without explaining yourself. In the morning, you just ran off to work without explaining anything to me. We had plans this weekend, yet you didn't even care about that. Now, you are telling me that you are on your way from Vaal to Centurion to see your friend? Le teng I found out because I am the one who called you. It doesn't bother you that something is wrong about all this? I’m really disappointed Lavo, I’m actually hurt. Worse, you are treating me so cold. You last saw your kids on Thursday night, yet you don't even ask about them. Is this how you want things to be between us? Is this the new direction our marriage is now taking? Is this how you are going to treat me and the kids?So distant and cold?"

Lavo: " You are overreacting Bobo. Actually you are imagining things. Yes I know we had plans, but I was busy with business stuff, I have been overwhelmed lately, and I’m not coping well, so forgive me for being distant and making you feel otherwise. I will make it up to you and the kids soon shugaboo; just give me time to sort myself out. Only a week or two, all will be back to normal."

Nna: “A week or two Kevin? Nnaare o ntse o ikutlwa hore wa reng? Are you hearing yourself well? Must our marriage and being parents wait for two weeks for you to sort yourself out? Really? Kevin Tau, I'm not satisfied with your reasoning. Firstly , I am your wife, and I had no idea that you are overwhelmed, stressed and not coping, yet I am only finding out about that? Why am I the only one in the dark about the challenges you are facing? Why didn't you tell me hore you are overwhelmed? What happened to supporting and being there for each other through thick and thin? And what will Kgosi help you with, by going to him first? Secondly, why am I finding stuff out over the phone? Kevin Tau weee, don’t patronize me tlhe.”

I was really pissed off by what this man was telling me. He was Overwhelmed and not Coping? Yaa neh.. Le kgale. That’s just excuses over excuses. There was more to being overwhelmed than he was letting on. Last night he said he was going through some shit…That I can’t help him and also he didn’t know how to get out of whatever was bothering him. Worse, he said there was nothing money couldn’t fix. That cannot be overwhelmed. It seemed like something big…What was it though? I really needed to find out what was eating my husband up. Sengwe sona se mo tshikinnye maikutlo, and definitely not me. But what could it be? I thought to myself.

Nna: “Why don’t you fetch me, re ye together ko Kgosi then afterwards re ye ko ntlung o tsebe ho njwetsa hore molato ke eng? Maybe we can sort out or come up with a solution for you problems or you being so overwhelmed. I was about to go to Omo to see the kids, so I will leave my car there and you can come fetch me there on your way to Centurion. We need this Kevin. I need you to be ok, for me and for the kids. We miss you, I miss us? "

Lavo: " I miss you and the kids too my Shuga. I would love to take you up on your suggestion, but Aish, e ka se sebetse, I am already towards Centurion. I am actually from Pretoria side. Bobo, I will be ok. Wena relax. Go see the kids. I will see you later at the house. We will talk later "

Ok, let’s retrace all this.

Its 14:30, normally, Kevin would still be at work this time , not even about to come home. Today, on the day he was not even supposed to go to work, o njwetsa hore he was from Pretoria and now passing by his friend's house. What on earth was going on here?

Earlier when I realized that he was not home, I called him, asking him hore o ho kae. He said, he was halfway to Vaal, meaning, He was going to work. He said something about going to finish off whatever that he couldn’t finish yesterday.

He never mentioned any meetings tsa Pretoria today, so when did he go to Pretoria and One a ile go dira eng ko Pretoria? I had million questions in my head but, I needed to find out the answers from Kevin.

Nna: "Holokile, Lavo, go to Kgosi. Since you are already there, and can’t pick me up, I will drive to Omo’s place, and ask Olefile to drop me off there."

I hung up before he could answer or try to talk me out of joining him at Kgosi’s. I was dead seriously going there, since he was playing cats and mouse with me. We have to talk things through. This has gone a bit too far and if I leave it hanging, it might get out of order. I know if he goes to visit Kgosi, he would be home very late. Me joining him will show him how serious and desperate I need us to talk. We have to talk and sort out this cloud hanging over us.

Ole was done talking to his girlfriend, he came to our table while I was still talking on the phone and then he left. He must have heard me talking to Kevin, complaining. So he didn't want to impose so he left me there. I looked around for him, and couldn't see him. I paid the bill and left JBs.

I was looking around for him when a message came through my phone. Somehow I knew it was my husband, I ignored it. I dialed Ole to find out hore o ko kae?. He answered, saying He went to fetch his car as he parked far away. I told him that I'm going to leave, and wait for him by the Bp garage just on Corlett Drive. He said okay.

When I get to BP, I decided to check out the message. Yoo, it was indeed my husband.

He wrote:

DO NOT come to Kgosi’s place. Why are you behaving like a DRAMA QUEEN? Stop with this nonsense and be a wife and a mother. Stop behaving like a little puppy looking for its mommy. Why must you want to follow me around while visiting my friends? Don’t you have friends to visit? Kgosi and I are going to be discussing business ideas. What will you be doing? Anyway Motsheoa is not home, so you will be bored. Rather go and look after the kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ouch….when it rains it pours. Ke tseo gee! Message from a Husband to his Wife…..

I don’t believe in witchcraft or any of those stuff but I swear, monna wame was behaving like he was possessed by some evil forces. O loilwe ka nnete. The Devil was busy working on him.

Honest and truthfully this was not my husband … The Lav’of my Life…

This was the works of the Devil….It cannot be my husband who typed and send me such a harsh message.

I just sat there in my car so beaten up, so defeated, so shocked and so hurt… The message was playing in my ears as if I was listening to a voicemail or voice note. It clearly wasn’t my husband’s voice though, but a very harsh coarse and heartbreaking tone. I don’t know how the devil sound, but I swear the voice I heard was that of the Devil himself…

Ouch Drama queen? Did Kevin send me that crappy message? Really Kevin! Bafokeng ba ntswetse. Something was definitely awful with my husband. He has been so unpleasantly rude, mean and such a belerutwane the past day and today. Something very new in my marriage. Kevin has never in his life spoken to me like that nor called me names . Something smelled fishy.

I felt sick to my stomach. Why was he behaving so dodgy and so irritable and impatient with me.? This was a first.

It was really happening. My husband was throwing hints at me. He was telling me that I was no longer important in his life. His work and his friends and maybe She’tenders were the things that kept him busy.

I thought of replying his message but decided against it. I was heartbroken. I didn’t know what to do.

My head was spinning…

Actually, maybe I should pay him and Kgosi a visit there by Centurion. Just to check what they were up to. Mmmm He even mentioned that his cousin Motsheoa wont be home.

The question was, should I go or not. What if I get a shock of my life?

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