Broken Vows - Diary ya ga Obonolo Chapter 80 - Mzansi Stories

Wednesday, October 14


Broken Vows - Diary ya ga Obonolo Chapter 80


We spoke briefly about our honeymoon, and I asked her when was she due and all other stuff. 

Motsheoa: “Makananelo, o dira eng batho ba kwa Tau wena? I spoke to you mother in law earlier.”

Nna: "Ao Tsheoa, did I do something wrong bathong? Ebe gotwe ke dirile eng?" 

Motsheoa: "Ke a bapala, you didnt do anything wrong, well not according to mma-Malome."

Nna:” I saw you guys together, o ne a fetsa ho tloha ho nna. Hai mmatsale waka ena ka nnete, she is something else.”

Motsheoa: “She is hey! She was going on and on about you not being ready to give her grandkids. She said wena you are those career woman who don’t know the importance of family. Hai. Nolo, She scared me. She said she would do whatever it takes to ensure that Kevin makes you pregnant. A re she will ask around for some pills or medication that clears out any prevention pills you are taking. Yoo Nolo, o be careful, that woman! I won’t let anything passed her. She is like that, and trust me she will do anything she puts her head and mind to it. She mentioned something about asking Kevin to swop your pills so that you can be pregnant. Be careful dear, that woman is on to you.”

Ooh, I forgot to mention that Motsheoa is related to the Tau family. Her mom and Kevin’s dad are siblings. She is Kevin’s cousin. She met Kgosi 2006 ka traditional wedding ya rona ko Sebokeng. So that is why she knows my mother in law so well. Ke mmamalome wa gagwe.

Yoo I was lost for words hearing what my own mother in law could proudly say that about me and the length she was prepared to go to ensure that I fall pregnant. Whatever it takes is such a heavy statement for a person to make. It meant a person would do anything possible to achieve their goals, nor matter what it will cost them. So I got a little uneasy about her making such a bold statement. Ka nnete.

Nna: “Yo kidding me right? Did she say that? She would do whatever it takes? How does she even plan to convince my husband to swop my pills? Really? I know my pills and their packaging, I would see if it has been tampered with…Again, I doubt that Kevin will allow her to make him to do such nonsense. Thanks though for the heads up!”

Motsheoa: “You are welcomed. Please don’t fight with your husband because of that crazy mother of his. Ignore her and just be careful. Please don’t confront her as well. Wena carry on with your life, but stay alert. She is just desperate to see Kevin having kids. She even said boKgosi le bo Tiego ba sia mora hae ka tema, while you are busy pooping the pills. So I think she is just looking out for her son, in a wrong way though”

Hai, this was getting too much now. Is my mom in law that desperate to have Kevin’s grandkids to be such devious? Ka nnete, this was getting to bore me. I wonder o tlo bolella mme wa ka a reng? My mom always knew how to nicely put her on her place. I am sure she will tell her that "All should be left to God to approve"

Why does she say I am a career woman who doesn’t know the importance of family? Just because I was not ready for kids, in her views it meant I won’t want to have them later. Or I didn't know the importance of family? Hai.

Nna: “You know Tsheoa, Kevin just threw the topic of baby making at me, out of nowhere. We have never sat and discussed it. To tell you the truth, I never thought about it. I just felt I was not ready. I got even more pissed off when he mentioned that his mom was pressuring him, hence he started pressuring me. I don’t think Kevin is ready to have a family, He is just being cornered. I really don’t have a problem with having kids. I just had my own ideas about when. I just feel the timing for me is not right. Aish, this is too much for me ka nnete. I see this being an everyday topic in our marriage. It might even be a problem because Mmatsale has been vocal about it and going around telling people to tell me that I should be pregnant.It means le Kevin will put even more pressure,. Hai”

Motsheoa: “I feel you girl. Just think about it and sit with Karabello and plan when you think it’s time. Yaa, I see it being a problem. Kevin’s mom will push and push..And if Kevin doesn’t stand his ground, or he listens to her, He will also keep talking and pressuring you. So think about it. Motherhood is not such a bad thing. You can have it all.I see a lot of professionals having kids, and still flourish in their careers. Woman can bare it all dear. I would advise you to just have kids and grow with them. It is possible. Trust me on this.”

Nna:"Ho lokile. I hear you. Maybe I must just give in.for peace sake or else, I wont rest till I give in.Thanks."

Motsheoa and I hugged and headed to the Kitchen. Batso, Retha and Refilwe were preparing to dish up.
Just as we got to the kitchen, my sister in law Rethabile commented about Motsheoa's baby bump and then asked me when do I plan to fall pregnant? She even went on that she can’t wait to see how I would look when I fall pregnant.

I smiled back at her and said, the oven is on 180 degrees, about to bake the first bun. Deep inside I was getting irritated by the constant question about me starting the family. Hai. Maybe my in-laws think I am barren. Why will they all ask me such question? Really, you can never ask a woman such question, especially if you do not know her reasons. In Laws maar!

Anyway we all laughed so hard. Just then Motsheoa put her hand on her tummy, as if she was feeling pain. We all looked at her and asked if she was ok. She then said the baby kicked. She asked me to put my hand on her tummy, wow...That was the best thing I have ever experienced. Feeling that baby kicking and seeing the movement just by looking at her huge tummy. Mm that must be the greatest feeling ever. I said it out loud.

She looked at me and said, I should wait till it happens to me. She said she can’t describe it to me properly but that she knew I will enjoy every moment to come once the bun starts kicking inside of me. She said it was one beautiful moment in a woman's life.
Yaa neh, this pregnancy sales people around me...They can sell anything and wa e reka net daar. I was really sold. I wanted to start a family. Scared as I was, I really could not wait to feel a life growing inside of me and kicking...

All the elders and the man of the family were eating. We went and dished up for ourselves and sat with the big sisters, catching up. We spoke about everything, from kids to work, furniture and husbands and life in general.

The day went pretty fast. It was time for goodbyes.

DK and Omo were clearing up the dessert dishes; Kevin and I were saying goodbye to the family. Everyone left, except ausi Reatli and Omo and their little girls. Nyiko (Reatli’s husband) did not pitch to the house. Well he being a prominent political figure, and a business man meant little time with family and always hard at work. We had to understand at times that He was very busy.

Kevin was busy playing with the girls at the patio making so much noise.

Omo le skeem sa gagwe Dikengkeng (DK) ba ne bale busy ko kitchen, going on and on. Laughing so loud.

Ausi Reatli was sitting alone by the lounge, a lebega ekete o miles away. I went to sit with her. We initially spoke about Abu Dhabi, and the wedding pictures. She commented about Batso glowing and looking happy. I told her gore Batso was expecting baby number two. She said that explained the glow.

Reatli: “ka nnete go a thabisa go bona batho ba bangwe ba thabile manyalong a bona. Go hlakile , marriage is a beautiful institution, that two people enter into with intentions to love and protect each other. It’s only the people in it who turn to spoil it.”

Nna: “Ka nnete it is a good institution. Yes, botlhokwa ba lenyalo, ke Lerato, tlhokomelo, tshireletso le kutlwisano. Those are indeed the keys to a happy ,healthy and fulfilling marriage. But some people are not having it easy. I realized that marriage can also be tough.”

I was thinking of Obakeng and Batso's marriages. They were both going through some unpleasant stuff yet so different. So I guess that was “for worse" phase of” For better or worse” vows we make ka lenyalo.

I so wish gore ke ska iphitlhela in that position mo lenyalong lame.

I always pray God to protect my marriage and my relationship with Kevin.

I almost never had a beautiful ending of my Wedding, and ever since then, I promised myself that I will work hard to ensure we have a perfect marriage. I hope Kevin felt the same way. So far, apart from the meddling mamazala, we were doing great. I hoped it last forever…50 years as Kevin said…

I dismissed my thoughts.

Nna: “how have you been mara ausi waka?. Last week when we met for lunch, you said you were not feeling good. O hantle jwale?”

Reatli: Aish nnaake, ke di on and off. Goya le matsatsi. Other days are better than the other. Go tla siama. I just have to be strong and stick it out."

I was just amazed by her answer. Why was she saying she must be strong and stick it out? I thought she was physically sick, and getting her medication to be ok, but her answer suggested that it was more emotional sickness than your day to day ailments.

I chose not to impose or ask what she meant.

Nna: "argh ausi, ka nnete go tla siama. As long as you are okay now."

I changed the topic and asked her about Mr Baloye, her husband.

Nna: "O ya jaang Ntate wa ko ntlung? I didn’t see him at our wedding. Di Tender di mo keeper busy neng? I was expecting to see him today"

I jokingly said.

Reatli: MaKananelo, hai, Nyiko o tshwere ke di tender tsa mahlo a mabedi.Anyway, I don’t know hore o kae, I guess he is somewhere in the world chasing those She’tenders. I kicked him out of our home"

Nna: “What? Are you serious? Ke tse difeng tseo di She’tenders tsa matlho a mabedi?”

Reatli: “Those are tenders tse di nang le mahlo, matswele, dibono, le punani. Those She’tenders are keeping my husband (well soon to be ex) busy."

I laughed at the description of the tenders. Yoo, ena e thata taba…I just thought Reatli was joking about her statement…but why would she joke about such statement? Husband who would soon be ex and, the one she kicked out and also not knowing where her husband was? That was scary

Nna: “Ao tlhe ausi, wa bua ntate Baloye hampe jena? When does he even get time for those She’tenders? He seems like a very busy man."

Reatli: “Eya, he is very very busy with them..Haaa, you will be surprised ngwaneso. He does have plenty of time with those tenders, more than he has with his own family."

Yoo, this woman was dead serious about what she was saying. E ka be ke lona lebaka la her sadness and her negative statements she made earlier about marriage? Hmm, I wondered.

She continued

Reatli: “Makananelo, you are the only person I am telling you this, please keep it that way. O ska bolella anyone about this conversation. I don’t want my family to know my intentions. I want to handle this my own way.

I have been suspecting that Nyiko was cheating on me, but I always ignored the signs or believed his stories and lies whenever I confronted him. There's been woman calling him late at night, unexplained hotel bills for two, receipts for woman stuff that were definitely not mine and used condoms in his car. All those stuff he would go on and deny them. I was turning a blind eye as my mom always say, until a weekend of your wedding.

That weekend, He told me he was appointed to go to Cape Town, for work purposes, so unfortunately he would not be at the wedding. I believed him. I packed his suitcase for him, and he left Friday. I was not bothered by his sudden last minute trip, because he does have those emergency trips, now and again. It’s been like that from the beginning of our relationship and he would sometimes refuse to go and ask that they appoint someone to go. At times I would persuade him to just go..

When he told me about the Cape Town trip, I was not happy due to the timing. It was his brother in law’s wedding. I begged him to ask the office to let someone go. He said they refused and that He had no choice but to go. I had to accept especially when he said he would do the meeting fast and fly back Saturday motshegare, to at-least make it to the reception and your birthday party.

On Saturday, he didn't even try to call. I was worried about him. I tried to call him, but his phone was on voice mail. I was looking at the time; He was supposed to be back already. At around 16:30, I tried calling him again. I only wanted to know if he was coming back or not.

A lady picked up his phone....”

Just as aus Reatli was blowing me ka ditaba tse boima; Omo came to sit with us. She immediately changed the topic. We just discussed DK le Omo’s friendship. I followed suit, discussed their bond. I even asked Omo hore o bua eng le DK se se mo tshegisang so. We could hear them laughing by the kitchen when clearing and cleaning up.

Omo was laughing, are DK o mo bolella ka life in Lesotho. So she enjoys her company. We both laughed. Dk was now bathing the girls. Kevin joined us by the lounge.

Aish, this two are really disturbing us. For them to come sit here with us, I knew, I was not going to hear the whole story. Reatli seemed like she wanted to offload. So I quickly, derived a plan. I decided; let me send the two conversation-crushers out to buy us something, anything. Just to get rid of them. I thought Mmm.

Nna: “Lavo le Omo, nna ke galetse Magnum tlhe, do you mind getting to spar to buy us magnum? Ooh and there is no bacon for tomorrow’s breakfast. I want to wake up early and spoil you guys to a serious continental breakfast.”

I winked at Reatli, who supported me and also asked for something from the shop.

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