Dygo-Ring of Lies, Secrets & Betrayals Chapter 9 - Mzansi Stories

Sunday, July 24


Dygo-Ring of Lies, Secrets & Betrayals Chapter 9


Is the wrong choice wrong if it still brings you to the right place? If it brings about the right opportunities? Teaches you the right lessons? Turns you into the right person?
These are the questions I've been struggling with. I agree, everyone makes mistakes, makes poor life choices and heads down the wrong path. Every single individual on this planet learns in the same manner: from mistakes.
More than just that, people need to make mistakes in order to learn — without mistakes, we rarely make the causal connection between our actions and our consequences.Without experiencing the results of making the wrong decisions, we don't have sufficient reason to avoid said decisions.
In a sense, the only way to live the right life is to first live the wrong one — and to hate yourself for it.
It's no secret that the biggest mistakes we make are the ones that affect us the most. It's these mistakes that have the most dire consequences, ones that are usually irreversible.
I've come to believe that the only way to truly make a change — a significant change — is to hate yourself for allowing yourself to make the wrong decisions.It's not so much about hating the outcome of those decisions. That's easy. It's about hating yourself for allowing yourself to make them.
In reality, as human beings, we almost always need to reach this point before we can get a full grasp on our lives and our realities. We need to, at the very least, see the bottom before we can make our way back aboveground.
That’s a fact....and I believed that’s what seemed to have been happening in Kevin' s life. He perhaps needed to screw things up so awfully bad that he learns to never repeat the same things again. Of course, this isn't the case for everyone. Some people never learns. I hoped for everyone’s sake, especially Kevin himself , that he would learn from this screw-up and change for the better. Milano convinced me that much that, this could be the breakthrough that Kevin needed to get his ducks in order.
I must say that I was not too convinced that Kevin was capable of changing or would learn his lessons, but I must say, he caught me by surprise. I never thought I’d wake up to the crazy man admitting his craziness and even willing and ready to pay for his crimes. Everything that he said made sense. The memory coming back, drugs, alcohol and the fact that his parents were neglecting him was enough to drive any man crazy. I was disappointed at his family, especially his mother and little sister Reatli. They made sure Kevin chose them over his kids and me, yet they neglected him. I couldn’t believe that they didn’t see his self distracting behaviour and tried to help him.
Although his family were to be blamed, still, He was responsible for his own life decisions and direction. And he unfortunately made wrong and bad choices that I so strongly believe that he needed to take responsibility for, hence I chose not to tell him the truth about the man he shot and what he asked me to do. I guess part of me wanted to see if he will go through with his decision to hand himself over to the police.
So, after his request to drive him to the nearest police station, I asked him to wait for the kids to wake up so that he can say a proper goodbye to them. I also advised him to go home to tell his parents in case he gets locked up on the spot. I told him that they might start wondering where he was and why he will be away from them. At first he said it didn’t matter if his family doesn’t find out about his whereabouts. I insisted that he should tell them before they will start blaming and accusing me of his decision.
He said he will think about it. I asked him why he thought going to jail would make up for everything and he said that was the only way to pay for what he did. I asked him if he was sure he wanted to do that. I suggested that perhaps he must go to counselling and or rehab and only after he was mentally and physically and emotionally fit, he could opt for jail. He said going to jail will cover all the help he needed. He said in jail there won’t be drugs, or alcohol or guns or freedom to allow him to mess up or hurt me or anyone anymore. He said painful and hard as it was, he will be better off in prison, away from everything else.
It really pained me to hear Kevin talking like that. Listening to how he was beating himself too hard and adamant to make things right,
I tried stopping him but he insisted on doing that. Well, if that’s what he wanted to do, so be it. Milano was right, if Kevin was to pay for his debts, it should not be because I forced or I facilitated his downfall. He made that decision and I had to respect it. If you play you must pay.
We spoke about the running of the business and everything else going forward. We realized that there was so much he needed to take care of before he go to prison. I suggested that he should put handing himself over on hold and go sort out a few things first. We agreed that he will hand himself over to the police first thing on Monday. Poor Kevin, he really was determined to make things right. Talk about the last kick of a dying horse.. I must say I felt so sorry for him. He kept thanking me and apologising for what he did and what he was about to do to the Kids blah blah.
At some point He even asked me if I haven’t heard anything from my colleague or his family. I gave him a short answer: No. Yes it was true, I haven’t heard from them nor Milano since last night. I was not planning to tell him about Milano’s lastnite phone call .
Kevin asked me about my plans for the day. I told him what my plans were. He told me his and asked if he could come back to spend the Sunday with the kids and say goodbye. I agreed. He decided to leave and go sort things out.
Around twelve we were all ready to go. By twelve thirty we were at Gallo Manor, Kanoyarona Lediga’s birthday party. I took all my helpers with so that they could look after the twins and help where they can. We had so much fun. For a moment I forgot about my complicated life and mingled with my friends. Kevin came to the party around four in the afternoon. He told me that he was going to sleep over Kagiso’s place and would see us in the morning. The day went down without any issues. We went back home.
Given Kevin’s decision, I thought of what Milano and I decided to do by covering up the shooting. So if Kevin goes ahead, there will be trouble for both of us. We might be prosecuted if the truth comes out. I needed to get hold of Milano warning him about Kevin’s plans to hand himself over. Unfortunately his phone was still on voicemail. I didn’t want to discuss such pressing issue on sms nor voicemail, in case his phone lands on wrong hands. I send him a message asking him to call me urgently. We needed to get our facts or story right.
I slept without hearing from Milano. I was now panicking. The lies were catching up with me. I thought if I don’t hear from Milano by Sunday afternoon, I will have to tell Kevin the truth and stop him from handing himself over.
I was awoken by the kokoberries’ noises. I went to check why they were so noisy. I was met by Kevin busy dressing them up. He was all so cleaned up and dressed in a suit. He said he wanted to go to church with us. I did not want to burst his bubble because we were not planning to go to church but I agreed for his sake. I also went and got ready. Mamo was busy marinating the ribs for lunch while DK prepared breakfast. While Kev and I were finishing eating, Mamo and DK prepared themselves. They said they were joining us. We drove in Kevin’s car to church.
After church service, Kevin asked me to go with him to see the pastor. Even the pastor was so shocked to see Mr Tau after such a long time. He told pastor that he was living a very ungodly life and did things he now regrets. He asked Pastor to pray for him. Pastor prayed and spoke to him in private. Then we left.
We got home and Kevin volunteered to make lunch for us. DK helped him in the kitchen. They cooked up a storm. Some ribs, salads and the works. I must say Kevin was so hyper and super happy. I guess the twins brought the bubbly loving father out of him. We ate and mingled and decided to sit outside. Kevin played with the kids while I relaxed by the patio watching him laughing and having fun with the kokoberries. I must say I loved and enjoyed such a perfect view. But I knew it was just for a little while. It was more like a goodbye. Kevin asked me not to discuss what was going to happen to him. He said he wanted to spend his last day as a freeman with his kids without having to be reminded about what lies ahead.
While we were chilling outside, Kevin kept going in and out of the house, like frequently. Most of the time I would even ask him to refill my glass of wine. Funny enough, Kevin was not even drinking alcohol. He was pumping bottled water all through the time. I guess he was hydrating himself and ridding his body of too much toxic he’d been feeding his body for the last months of binging. I was just proud of him for how he was owning up for his mess.
Mamo took the kids for ice cream. I was left with Kevin outside. Dk was taking a nap. While sitting, I noticed that Kevin was not okay. He started shaking and shivering. At first I ignored him but I kept checking him out. He was getting worse. I asked him what was wrong. He brushed me off saying it was a bit chilly outside hence he was cold. I accepted his explanation and told him to go get a jacket. Few minutes later, Kevin was back, without a jacket. He lay flat o the floor, he started sweating and trembling. I kept asking if he was feeling ok. As he lift up his face towards me, I saw his pupils dilating, then there was some white powder on top of his nose and some blood coming out of his nostrils. He started having shortness of breath. His breathing became rapid , slow, deep and shallow.
It didn’t need a genius to figure out what was happening to Kevin. He had taking some drugs. I quickly rushed to the guest bathroom to get some wet towel to wipe the blood that was oozing out of his nose. To my surprise, I found a small packet of half empty white powder thrown inside the towel drawer.
Holy crap! Ooh shit! What the heck was Kevin up to?
I went back to where I left him. Right there before my eyes, lay a motionless Kevin. I freaked . All I could think of was shouting and screaming at him. I kept trying to wake him up, calling his name. I took my phone called Aus Tsitsi. She advised me what to do and said I should rush him to hospital. I checked his pulse. It was there but a bit faint. Kevin was slowly drifting away. I phoned DK to come help me carry him to the car.
I drove to Life Wilgeheuwel Hospital. We arrived there as fast as I could drive. Kevin was wheeled into emergency room. I was pacing up and down wondering what was happening in there.
A lot of thoughts went through my mind. Ever heard of “sense of chaos? Where you feel like the world is spinning out of control? You don’t know the meaning of what’s going on, or what's going to happen next? You have runaway fears, where your imagination kicks into high gear? Your mind is filled in with all the unknowns by finding worst case scenarios and dwelling on them? And when you revisit those scenes over and over in your head, they begin to seem like reality.
Was this my fault? Why did I lie to Milano in the first place? Why did I listen to Milano by not reporting the shooting? Maybe Kevin would have been arrested and been safe in prison! Why didn’t I drive him to the police station yesterday when he asked me to? Why didn’t I tell him what Milano did and asked me? Oh Modimo! What kind of a person had I become?
A lot of bad things had been happening in my life? This must be some kind of punishment. This was Karma?
While I was deep in thoughts , blaming myself , a doctor came out of the room where Kevin was taken to. I hurried to meet him up.
Doctor: Mrs Tau
Nna: Yes doctor. How is he?
Doctor: Are you here with someone? A relative?
Nna: No! I’m alone. Dr please tell me how is my husband?
Doctor: I am really sorry..
Nna: Sorry? Sorry for what doctor? Sorry for what... You are sorry that I’m alone or sorry that my husband. No no no Please don’t tell me ...
Is my husband dead? Is Kevin dead? I just fell down to my knees before the doctor and closed my ears. I was not ready to hear the answer. I was not prepared for what might come out of the doctor’s mouth. God knows I would not handle anything bad!

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26 July 2016 at 13:29 delete

Thank you Nolo...
Very sad but sooooo looking forward to the next insert....