Unscripted love Chapter 81 - Mzansi Stories

Tuesday, August 2


Unscripted love Chapter 81


Maybe my problem is that when I’m lost I look for you, not myself. Unknown.
I followed the Uber driver to his car and slid in the passenger seat, buckling up. As we drove away from the stadium, the blaring vuvuzelas and ecstatic Sundowns fans assaulted my ears. I frowned at the noise that made my head pound.
Halfway home, the driver pulled into a gas station and filled up the tank. Just when he was just about done, my phone rang and seeing Sbahle’s name on my phone screen reminded me that Levi and I didn’t have bread. My cousin could live on bread alone. Sometimes we’d share a meal and she’d still have a slice of bread as if it were dessert.
“I’m gonna grab something, be back now.” I informed the driver and answered the call with a simple hello.
“Levi played so well tonight. What a way to bid farewell, two goals in one match.” Sbahle squealed.
“Since when do you actually watch soccer?” I chuckled.
“Since I’ve been trying to make things right with Alu. Kwame and I are done, forever this time.”
I sighed, having heard that story before. I didn’t probe for details of Kwame’s latest transgression as I walked through the glass doors. “I must come over sometime so that you can tell me all about it.”
“About that…. I’m kind of, sort of living with Alu temporarily.” She said.
I wanted to scream but I had to bite my tongue. “What? Where? How? Weren’t you the same person preaching to me about people that move in together when lobola hasn’t been paid?”
Sbahle: So many questions, such little time. Listen, Alu called and-
“Called when? I thought you said that he never wanted to see you again when you broke up with him the last time.” I interjected.
“Wait, let me tell you the story. Alu called last week to check up on me and we ended up speaking for hours. I so happened to mention that I have to look for a new place because you moved out. I also pointed out that it was kind of hard to find the right place at the right price and he randomly offered me a place to stay while looking. Under normal circumstances I wouldn’t have accepted the offer but saw that as a golden opportunity to fix things between us.”
I grabbed a loaf of Low-GI bread, thirst suddenly bubbled in my throat and I headed towards the refrigerator. “So now you are back together?” I asked. One of the petrol attendants had his back turned to me, his nose stuck in a magazine.
Sbahle continued, “At first he kept telling me that we are better off as friends yada yada and shut down any talks of us getting back together. Three days into living together, a bottle of wine ensured that we both woke up on his bed….. I don’t remember what went down but my vagina was throbbing the next morning and he asked me to take morning after pills. I’ve sort of moved to his room now.”
“So are you girlfriend and boyfriend or just fuck buddies?” I sought clarification. I studied the selection of drinks before reaching for peach ice tea whilst listening to Sbahle trying to explain the nature of her relationship with Alu. According to her a relationship could be inferred from their living arrangements and occasional coitus but I wasn’t so sure about that.
“Hold on a sec.” I told Sbahle and turned to the petrol attendant. “Hi, excuse me, do you guys have this in lem-” A small yelp sprung from my lips when the guy turned around to face me. The bottle escaped my hands and crashed onto the floor. When the cap popped off, ice tea splattered all over my sneakers and pants, but I didn’t even notice the mess.
Sandiso simpered. “Hi, sthandwa sami. Do not run. I just want to talk to you, that’s all.”
An invincible force wrapped around my throat and I gasped for air, cold sweat spilled from every pore of my body. Before I could faint, my hand reached for the refrigerator door to steady myself. My eyes were fixed on him like a mouse on a snake while I continued to breathe heavily. All my mind registered at that very moment was one single thought – run but my feet didn’t get the message fast enough as they froze on the spot.
“Let’s go back to your cab. Mindlos will drive us to a park nearby where we can sit and talk. I just want to talk. Let’s go.” Sandiso’s order was followed by him throwing a fifty on the counter and a little jerk of his head. The realisation that he knew the cab driver’s name halted my mental plan to bolt to the car. My stomach dropped and my eyes scanned the shop for another exit. Instantly, my face burned and a surge of panic erupted inside of me when Sandiso grabbed my hand.
I tore myself loose with a push to his chest. Without giving my plan much thought, I bolted towards the bathroom, running as fast as my feet allowed. Where there is a bathroom there is a window, I’d lock myself in long enough to make my exit. Sandiso’s heavy grunt behind me made me realise he was on my heels and I picked up the pace.
I flew in the bathroom, and cursed when I didn’t see a lock in the small room housing a single toilet. With trembling hands I opened the window that was hardly big enough for me. I used the sink as leverage to help me up there, my heart beat faster than ever before.
Then it just stopped beating.
All hope was lost when a pair of hands grabbed my waist and roughly pulled me back. A scream of defeat left me, but I tried holding onto the window railing while attempting to kick Sandiso away. Yet another pair of hands got hold of me, and that’s when I knew I’d truly failed.
When Sandiso and his goon released me, I collapsed on the floor, my heavy breaths were accompanied by tears of anxiety. I was promptly lifted to my feet. It wasn’t Sandiso hauling me up like I thought he would. His friend grabbed hold of my neck and pushed me against the wall. I instantly found myself shrinking back to my submissive self and stopped fighting out of fear that he would punch my stomach.
I looked into Sandiso’s eyes, they were dark as coals and the pity that settled behind them made me want to vomit.
“We can do this the easy way or the hard way.” His friend sneered and grabbed a fist full of my hair and I let out a cry of pain. My roots felt like they were being torn from my scalp as I was led to the bathroom door. I couldn’t keep my hand from meeting Mindlo’s hand clasped around my hair, making an attempt to loosen his unfaltering grip.

The way Sandiso allowed him to drag me like a dog struck me harder than the pain Mindlos inflicted on me. How could he just let it happen if he really cared about me like he claimed he did?
“Walk. Try stupid shit, you will regret it.” I did as his friend said and walked out of the bathroom. When curious faces turned towards us, the goon spanked my ass to make it seem like we’d been fucking in the restroom… all three of us. Sandiso didn’t do anything to stop his friend from degrading me as he put his hand in my back pocket and led me to the car.
“Sandiso, please do not do this. Please don’t hurt me.” I blubbered when I hopped in the car.
“That person is in the past.” Sandiso said as he closed the backdoor behind him and his friend drove out of the petrol station. “I have had a lot of time to sit back and think about things that happened when we were together and where we are now. I acknowledge that a lot of things have to change.
I loved you my way but I realise now that it wasn’t enough. I am going to love you as much as you loved me. Thinking about things I’ve done in the past and watching the recording of you on TV talking about all the hurt that I caused you hurts me more than I could ever verbalise.
I had the world in the palm of my hands. I was one of those that met the love of their lives too soon, when I still had a lot of growing up to do. I wanted to try out a lot of things that are part of growing up. I messed around with other women because I wanted to do crazy sexual things that weren’t okay to ask of you. I didn’t cheat because you weren’t enough. I cheated because I respected you too much to shove my penis and testicles in your mouth, fuck your anus or squirt my sperm on your body. I watched porn, I heard my friends talking and I wanted to try those things out but I couldn’t do that to a woman I loved and respected. Forgive me for being selfish. I was so focused on that I forgot that so much of you is exactly what I needed.
Trust me, I now know how it must have felt like loving me when you didn’t feel like you were getting what you needed in return. It stings. Loving someone unconditionally and hoping that they will eventually get to the same place as you feels like fighting a losing a war. I’m the one fighting the one sided war now. I’m the one with swallowed pride. To love more than you feel like you are loved is truly painful. Giving much more than you get back is agonising. I don’t wish it upon anyone, especially you. I am sorry that I ever made you feel that way.
I am so sorry for all the wrong that I have done in the past. I know that a simple sorry will never be enough. I know words are bullshit when your heart is breaking and you are hurting but I am going to be the person you’ve always wanted me to be. I am going to love you all the way to heaven and back.” He said then sat back in silence.
“Where are you taking me?” I whimpered when I no longer recognised where we were.
“Home…. I’m taking you home where we will raise our kids and hopefully have one or two more that have both our DNA. I am so happy to see you again. I hope you know that not a day goes by without me thinking about you. Everything and every day reminds me of us. My love for you hasn’t gone away. Just tell me that you feel the same way.” Sandiso beseeched.
“Sandiso, I want to go home.” I sobbed. My face fell in my palms.
He pulled me to him. “Shhhhh, we are going home sthandwa sami. We are going to wipe the slate clean and have a fresh start.”
Drugs. Alcohol. Sex. I was fast learning that these things were glorified in the world I lived in. It seemed like a good party was impossible without these three factors. Red cups were scattered around Sam’s house as well as the front yard, bass echoed throughout the whole main room, and the smell of sweat and hormones almost overpowered the smell of alcohol.
The game went so well that the scout personally congratulated Sam and told him that a team based in Belgium would be very much interested in him. He then threw a party in the moment, like he did almost every time we won a big game. If there was anything that Sam loved more than anything, was winning.
I lounged on the wrap around couch with Sibusiso and the team’s physician, Gregory. Gugu was sitting with us as well, her legs propped up on Sibusiso’s. It was clear that his personal trainer had a thing for him but Sibusiso was still nursing his heartbreak and trying to fix things with the woman that stepped out on him. I couldn’t understand it. I would never forgive someone for cheating. I told him to stop wasting his time on that woman and move on countless times to no avail. Hopefully Gugu would change that or serve as a much needed distraction.
“Come on, Sibu,” Gugu whined. “Please dance with me.” It was more than obvious that Gugu was drunk. An above the influence Gugu wasn’t one for begging.
“Why don’t you be a dear and get me a beer instead?” Sibu asked, adding a sickeningly sweet smile afterwards.
Gugu made a face at him. “Seriously?”
“Get me one too!” I chimed.
She sent me the same glare. “You two are lucky you’re cute.”
We smiled in satisfaction when she started walking towards the kitchen to get our drinks, giving us the perfect view of that firm apple shaped rump she carried behind her.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with you Sbuda, that girl can gurrr it. Given a chance I wouldn’t even check my pockets for condoms, I’d handle and think about AIDS the next morning.” Gregory said which made me laugh.
“So where is Thando tonight?” Gregory asked.
I sighed and said, “She went home right after the game. She was feeling nauseous and she isn’t a big party girl.”
“It’s good to know you still haven’t been able to poison Thando’s mind after all this time, Luvuyo.” The sarcastic tone could only have come from one source.
“Palesa, how nice of you to join us.” My tone was laced with sarcasm in return.
“Hey Pali!” Sibusiso waved at her and I glared at him for giving her airtime. He saw my face, but only shrugged at me, sending a ‘what?’ look my way.
“Hi Sbuda.” Palesa sent him a genuine smile. Apparently she didn’t think this minute of her being around was torture enough, she decided to sit down where Gugu had been sitting.
“What, no hi for me?” Gregory complained, placing his hand over his heart, a pained look following after. “Luvuyo, Lufuno and Sam got a shag. The assistant coach got a blow but no hi for me. Now I am really hurt.”
Palesa rolled her eyes. “That’s because your mzebhebhe is so thin, its offensive.”
“Thin?” Sibusiso chuckled.
“It’s as thin as a Vienna. And you? Why were you excluded from the shag list?” Palesa directed the question at Sibu and my eyes popped out.
“Errr, I didn’t think you’d want people to know.” Sibu said cautiously.
“Why not?” Palesa questioned.
Sibu: I don’t know, girls don’t kiss and tell.
Palesa: I do. Can I can tell you now that Luvuyo has the prettiest mzabhabha of the three of you but he can’t fuck for shit. There I was, bent over in the changing rooms, looking at this machine, ready to have the time of my life but dololo. It was over before it even began. If fucking was a sport in the Olympics they would have said ‘did not finish’.
Palesa’s revelation earned resounding laughter at my expense. “Fuck off. That’s because you have a gaping pussy.”
She smirked. “Keep telling yourself that. Let’s hope Thando doesn’t get tired of playing around with a man with the dick control of a ten year old who’s just discovered his dick can actually go into a vagina.”
I wanted her to leave already, she was ruining my night by her presence. “You have a big mouth for a person that has been stalking me.” I shot, my ego bruised by her statements.
“You thought I was doing that because the sex was great?” She asked sarcastically. “Oh no, doll. It was all for the money. I mean, who wouldn’t want a blesser that lasts just under a minute in bed? You don’t have to fake anything because the credits roll before you can even start acting. I must actually hook Thando up with a man that will fuck her right. Nobody should be subjected to bad sex for the rest of their lives.”
“Fuck you, piece of shit.”
“Anytime, anywhere babe.”
When I couldn’t stand her anymore, I got up and left for the kitchen to see what was taking Gugu so long. All questions were answered when I saw her propped on the counter with Sibusiso wedged between her legs, feeling up her shirt. His tongue was shoved down her throat, nearly choking her. I didn’t even notice him leaving the living room.
I grabbed a bottle of rum, making sure to avoid looking at the make out session going on a couple of feet away, and emptied some of it into a red plastic cup. Then I grabbed the coke that sat on the counter and filled the rest of the cup with that. After taking a sip, I realised that it was far too strong, but that’s better anyways.
Life was so much better when I could forget about my shortcomings as a man for a little while. Forget about my birthmother’s family, the Solomons and Sandisos of this world. Forget about everything. That’s exactly what the night was all about. Sometimes I just had to remember that I was young, I had to let go and have fun.
Gregory and some girl were now dancing in a big group with Lufuno. I shook my head at how ridiculous they looked since they were more than just a little tipsy and Babes Wodumo’s vocals blaring through the speakers was dragging them to ratchet status.
They were passing a joint around, each taking a puff as they danced to the beat. I blew out circles with the little bit that was left and chugged the rest of my rum and coke, ignoring the burning sensation that ran down my throat. My feet stumbled over each other in an attempt to get to Nthato and Kagiso, the effects of the alcohol kicking in. I changed direction and headed for Sam’s group when I spotted Khumo. She’d been calling my wife and Thando didn’t want anything to do with her so I had no business fraternising with the enemy.
Sam was downing a bottle of Distinkt Vodka, South Africa's first black-owned vodka brand. He forced the bottle to my lips when I stood next to him. I didn’t make a habit of drinking out of communal bottles, the thought of saliva on the rim grossed me out. Little drops of the drink spilled from the corners of my mouth when he finally pulled it away. My sight turned fuzzier than it was already when I hauled, “Cheers to the freakin' weekend, I drink to that, yeah yeah,” over the music. Sam chuckled and hauled along in encouragement.

Sibusiso and Gugu joined us as we continued to dance. Janet and Mbali started grinding on each other, making all the guys’ gazes wander. Our eyes didn’t leave them once their lips met.
“Stop gawking and dance, you perverts,” David yelled over to us.
No doubt more than half of us were turned on at this point. The best friends continued to grind their bodies against eat other, at least that’s what they called each other.
Sam’s main side grabbed a hold of his hand and he smiled almost uncomfortably at her, but she didn’t seem to notice. He started dancing with her, but it was almost like he wasn’t really there. It was obvious that he was still annoyed by her decision to get herself a boyfriend when he refused to leave his wife for her. The girl’s decision to nurse a relationship with a married man for five years was surprising because the young lady and her supermodel good looks wouldn’t have trouble getting a single man.
Pearl grabbed my hand and brushed up on me. When I gave her the side eye she rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to look at me like that. We’ve been friends for like ever. It’s just a dance Luvuyo, I’m sure Thando wouldn’t mind.”
She would. Our Love would mind seeing Pearl grinding on me, but I couldn’t be the only one dancing alone – I would look like an idiot. A smile stretched on my face as I pulled her to me. She was short so her butt was way below the reach of my groin, which was perfect. If she were to grind herself against that area, I would do things that I would live to regret.
Pearl grinned at me and flipped her wavy hair as her body moved with mine. Moving my hands up her thighs, I grabbed onto her waist, pressed her body tighter against mine. I relished on the feel of another well sculptured female body sandwiching me from behind. Just when I was getting into it, I saw Palesa holding her phone in my direction. My line of site turned red as I let go of Pearl and charged for the girl what was a constant source of annoyance.
“Smile for the camera honeybun,” she mocked my aunt’s nickname from earlier when my family had a mini farewell for me with the team and close friends in my suite. Palesa turned her phone around to show a small portion of the video that she’d been recording for who knows how long. “Man, Thando’s not gonna like this. She is at home, pregnant with your kid while you are out here doing drugs and feeling up on other women. All you soccer players are all the same.”
Without any hesitation, I grabbed Palesa by the arm and dragged her to the empty hallway that led to the bedrooms. Once we were out of site from everyone I slammed her into the wall, making her wince a little. “Oh, you want it rough today, honeybun? I like it rough and dirty.”
She looked up at me innocently, but she didn’t keep up the act for long. A satisfied smirk broke out on her face as she admired her handiwork of how mad she’d made me. “Don’t get your panties twisted, Luvuyo. All I’m doing is showing Thando, Sundowns, Arsenal, Bafana Bafana and your sponsors who you really are. A womanising druggie, that’s what you are…. You fucked the wrong one, bitch!” Palesa raised her eyebrows at me as she waved her phone in front of her. When I reached to grab it, she moved her hand just out of my reach. “Nuh uh uh.”
I could feel my body temperature rising as I glared at her. “If looks could kill.” She mocked.
A low growl escaped me as I hit my fist onto the wall not even an inch away from her head. Her body immediately tensed as her eyes squeezed shut out of fear. When she opened her eyes I said, “You are going to delete the video. You got me?”
She nodded but when she looked down, I followed her gaze. Realising that she was attempting to send the video to someone, I grabbed the phone from her as fast as I could and flung it against the wall. A gasp escaped Palesa, but it served her right.
“You gutless cow!” She raised her hand to strike at me, but I caught it before it landed on my cheek.
“Nuh uh uh you dumb bitch. You are a sad little nonentity that relies on riding and sucking dicks to feel like she matters to the world. Why don’t you get your sagging ass on whatever taxi that brought you to the city and go back to the kraal where you were raised. You think people here like being associated with a nobody like you? The work you do is meaningless, a job created by a cousin who felt sorry for your sad existence. Your life is meaningless. The life you live is meaningless. You should stay out of my way. Do not even think about taking this story anywhere to make up for your pathetic excuse for a career.” I spat.
“Let go of me,” she whined as she tried to pry my hand from her wrist.
Without letting her go, I pulled my wallet and took out two crisp notes with my teeth. Once I put the wallet back in my right back pocket, I put the money in the palm of her trapped hand. “Here. Fifty for your phone troubles and twenty for the shag. If you are going to be dishing it out without any effort, you might as well get paid for it. Twenty for a round sounds just about right for your gaping hole, I’m sure you wouldn’t even need to dilate during child birth.”
After I let go of her hand, I sent a wink her way before walking back to the party and the two ladies with a smirk on my face.
“You left your phone on the couch, wife has been calling non-stop. Your visa has expired,” Gabriel chortled. I sent the wife a quick text about the noisy room, switched the phone off and shoved it in my back pocket. This was going to be an epic night.

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