Dygo-Ring of Lies, Secrets & Betrayals Chapter 32 - Mzansi Stories

Tuesday, September 20


Dygo-Ring of Lies, Secrets & Betrayals Chapter 32


To know whether something is meant to be yours, let go of it. If it returns, it has always been yours to have. If it doesn’t, it was never meant to be.”
This was the case with a lot of people in my life. First it was Reatli, she cried herself back into my life. Just when I was getting used to the idea of her presence in my life, she seemed to have completely vanished into thin air. I know we’ve had our fair share of bickering and backstabbing but nor matter what we put each other through we were family.
Day after day since our last phone call, I tried to get hold of her so that I could just alert her of my suspicions and my meeting with her husband, but to no success. I sent her an sms using different numbers and my numbers asking her to call me back or meet up with me. She never responded. I even sent her a friend request and inboxed her on Facebook but still nothing. Looked like Mr and Mrs Baloye were on some honeymoon and didn’t want to be disturbed. I reached a point where I decided to stop bothering myself and stop reaching out to someone who clearly didn’t want me to be found. I moved on with my life.
Then it was my babies daddy. Kevin had been too quiet too. He called once in a while. The one time the kids were asking about him so I decided to call him. His phone went to an answering machine. I let the kids say something so that when he gets their voicemail he could call back. I put the phone on speaker and let the twins talk. Suddenly when the kids started talking he picked up. In a hurried tone he just greeted them and told them that daddy was busy and will call them back. Just before he hung up, I overheard a lady’s voice calling his name. Something like” sweetheart don’t keep me waiting too long”.
I quickly removed the phone on loudspeaker and asked him if the kids caught him at a bad time. He tried to explain, speaking in Sesotho but the lady that was talking at the background seemed to have gotten closer to Kevin because I was able to hear her moaning and groaning and making some kissing sound. Kevin seemed too distracted to talk. It was as if the lady held his blackmamba. Well actually having been married to this man for ages, I knew for sure that the reason why he couldn’t focus, he was being sexually pleasured while talking to me. I just hung up on him and told the kids that daddy was busy and he will call them.
I must say I was a bit hurt and disappointed. To think that I was feeling guilty about my feelings towards him and my plans to end our marriage yet he seemed to be having the time of his life, somewhere across the world. How dare he asked me to wait for him while he was moving on with his life? I decided to send him an email. In it I expressed my disappointments. I reminded him of his request to wait for him and asked him what his intentions were, since it was two months left before the six months period lapsed.
Days later still Kevin did not call the kids. I tried to call him again but this time the phone was not going through . I stopped trying to call him. One day while at work I received an email from him, replying to my questions. He told me that he never asked me to put my life on hold for him. He said he asked me not to divorce him until he was back and possibly regained his memories. So since his memories were still not fully back, he decided to extend his stay indefinitely.
I couldn’t believe my eyes but I had to accept that maybe Kevin had found someone else and couldn’t be bothered with us. Hard as it was, I replied and told him that unfortunately if he decides to extend his stay indefinitely, I wouldn’t force him but I certainly wouldn’t wait for him anymore. I told him that we would have to find a way to process the divorce even with him across the world. We needed to release each other officially and move on with our lives.

Following weeks I was busy with people who clearly wanted me in their lives. I was spending most of time with my kokoberries, both my God-sons, Kanoyarona Lediga and Opelong Keith Junior Carter together with their moms, Tshwarelo and Obakeng. Obakeng was busy with wedding preparations. Oh yes, my best friend finally divorced her abusive and control freak belerutwane Jabulani Khoza ( aka JK ). She was now soon to be Mrs Carter. At least one of us was getting their happily ever after. That gave me hope that maybe somewhere out there my Mr I will love only you forever was waiting for me.
Speaking about my Mr forever, Milano and I were somehow drifting apart. Or should I say he was pulling away from me. He was way too cold to an extent that whenever I would go to his office, I would take my jacket to keep warm. We were all about business and work. At the time when I needed him, when I needed a shoulder to cry on, he was not there.
The strange thing was, a while back he constantly hinted his interest in me, and kept telling me that he would never let anything or anyone hurt me ever again and that he would be patient and wait for the time when I would be ready. I must say somehow I was responding back to alert him that I was ready, although nothing ever happened beyond that. He seemed not to read between the lines that I wanted something more.
For several weeks, we trod on the very thin line that segmented close friends from a couple. At some point many of our colleagues thought we were dating because we had gotten so close. For what it was worth, I subconsciously thought so too, just that it wasn’t officialised. Unfortunately it seemed like I was up for a long wait because recently he was so distant. However, the lack of progress on the situation baffled and frustrated me. I kept asking myself, Why isn’t he doing anything? What was stopping him? What exactly was happening between us? And why sudden change of attention towards me?
For the most part, I simply accepted the fact that things would probably never get better than this. We were just colleagues and nothing more. With adaptive behaviour that seemed common to most other colleagues, we learned how to maintain our relationship. In some ways, it seemed enough but in the deepest part of me, I wasn't satisfied. But I had to remember that Milano and I had so much baggage to deal with. We both had pending divorces.

So by not wanting to be a loser who hung on even when the other person was not interested, I decided to let him go. I decided to stop whatever feelings I seemed to feel towards Milano. I stopped thinking of him as a romantic partner, I decided to look at him as just a good friend and a colleague, and decided to continue this friendship with this new understanding. Having undergone a rollercoaster of emotions the past weeks, I thought it was the end of this episode but I was wrong.
It was just the beginning. It’s true that an affair requires two things: opportunity and willingness. During my first years of marriage, there were opportunities, but not the willingness to act. And having been raised and grew up in a Christian family, I knew better. My family and my church defined my values in all things, including marriage. "'Till death do us part" meant a lifelong commitment; divorce was not an option; adultery ranked among the biggest and worst of sins. So, I thought not acting on my feelings for Milano was somehow a blessing in disguise. But thoughts never turned into action because I valued faithfulness, feared the consequences of infidelity, and didn't want to face the disapproval of others, including God.
That doesn't mean I was void of curiosity or desire. Disappointment with my marriage sometimes led me to wonder what it might be like to be with someone else. This disappointment alone wasn't enough to lead me into an affair, but I think it at least set the stage for what would eventually be played out. What happens when love begins to lose its heart? When feelings diminish and duty has to constantly pick up the slack?
One thought-without-action episode occurred while Milano and I were flown away to Cape Town to attend a week long conference. I must say I tried every excuse to not go to the conference with Milano but my boss insisted. I dreaded the entire week. The thought of going to be stuck in Cape Town with the cold shouldered Milano was unbearable. Day one of the conference was awful. Milano literally avoided bumping into me, even during the tea breaks , he seemed worlds apart and minding his own business. Not even asking me how I was settling or which room I was in. I decided to let him be. I played far away from him.
On the second day, I met a guy named Rufus. He was very attractive in both appearance and behaviour and oh boy the guy was so charming. Turned out that we were attending same conference and staying in the same hotel. I must say we enjoyed each other’s company and he occasionally sought me out during the rest of the week. We gotten a little close. No words was spoken; no inappropriate action made; but I had no doubt he would have shared a night with me if I had hinted at the desire to do so. That’s how temptingly charming he was.
On the Friday afternoon, the last day of the conference as everyone was getting together to say their goodbyes and celebrating the end of the long week, I took a rain check. I decided to go back to my room to start packing as we had an early flight back home the next day. Rufus was accompanying me to my room. When we got to the elevators, Rufus slipped his hand in my back pocket. I jumped a little because of the close contact he made while innocently touching my bum. I asked him what he was doing. He said he slipped a piece of paper with his hotel room number and his cellphone number. I laughed at his naughtiness. He said in case I changed my mind about my early night, I should give him a call or visit him in his hotel room.
As I took the little piece of paper out of my pocket, Milano was standing right beside us starring at us with disgust and very disapproving look. I ignored him and hugged Rufus good-bye. As the elevator arrived Rufus loudly said if I wanted some company and goodbye type of hanging out, I should use the numbers he gave me. I got inside and promised to give him a call later.
When the elevator reached fourth floor, it stopped and Milano walked to the door. I took it that he was getting off and heading to his room. Just as the door opened, he grabbed my hand and forcefully pulled me out. The elevator closed and moved up.
Nna: What do you think you are doing?
Milano: Are you going to do it?
Nna: Do what?
Milano: Call him or go to his room, whatever he wants?
Nna: That’s none of your business Mr Lebitso. Don’t you think?
Milano: Well, I just wanted to tell you to be careful. I know man like him, they will soft-talk you and lure you then leave you broken.
Nna: Excuse me! Who do you think you are? My overprotective big brother? And what do you take me for? A loose cannon that is easily lured and left broken? Oh Cum'on Milano, the only type of man I should be careful of is your type. One minute they are playing I want you in my life, the next minute they ignore your existence. I am sorry bro. I will do what I want to do, I certainly don’t owe you any explanation or need you to tell me to be careful.
Milano: Okay, I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you. I just don’t want you to get hurt.
Nna: Get hurt? By who? Anyway I must say your concern is so touching but don’t worry about me. I am a grown-bum woman, I can take care of myself big brother. Like I have done since we arrived in Cape Town. So if you would excuse me, I have some packing to do and people to hang out with. Good night.
Milano: Nolo...
I ran up the stairs and went to my room, leaving Milano standing there in front of the elevator. Nxxx. Who the hell does he think he is? I packed my bags, ordered room service and just catch up on social media. I checked if Reatli replied to my inbox messages or accepted my request. Nothing at all. I decided to call Rethabile and check on her. Her phone rang and went to voicemail. I checked my kids and my siblings. All was well.
I decided to take a shower and just relax. I wore my PJs and just browsed through the TV, thinking maybe I should call Rufus or just sleep. While I was contemplating to call a stranger to keep me company, an sms came through my phone. It was Milano. He was apologising for his behaviour early and asking me if he could come up to my room. He said there’s something he wanted to tell me. Initially I read the message and ignored it. Ten minutes later he sent another sms saying he was on his way. I thought he was bluffing because he never came to my room since we arrived, so I assumed that he didn’t know it.
Just as I was about to reply his message to tell him not to bother coming, there was a knock at the door. I went to the door to tell him myself that I was retiring for the night. I unlocked the door and just as I opened it, there before my eyes stood Rufus .
I asked him how he found my room. He told me he charmed some girl at information desk and got it. I invited him inside. We got inside my room. Rufus sat down and I went to the bathroom to change into my jeans. I was uncomfortable sitting with a stranger wearing my PJs. When I came out of the bathroom, there was a knock at the door. I went to check who it was. When I opened the door, Milano was standing on the door. I asked him what he wanted and told him that I had a visitor. He looked hurt but decided to leave. He asked me to come to room 403 before I sleep. I said sure and closed the door and went to join Rufus.
We drank wine and chatted about life and heartbreaks. I must say I was absent minded. Rufus must have noticed that. He said something that puzzled me. He just asked me if the person that was knocking happened to be the guy from the elevator and the same one from my company. I nodded and asked him why he thought it was hm. He said he had been watching him the entire week. He noticed how the guy was looking at me with overprotective eyes. He said if I didn’t tell him that we were colleagues, he would have concluded that we were lovers. He said that as a man he knew how a guy in love behaves around his lover. And that’s exactly how that guy behaved the entire week.The guy was in love with me, he said.
He advised me to go to his room and demanded that we speak about our feelings for each other. Rufus left shortly after. I wore my PJs and prepared for bed. I never took any overt action because I belonged to the old school thinking when it came to love. I didn’t think I should initiate anything if it was socially recognized that guys should take the lead. For some awkward reasons I wanted him to approach me and tell me how he felt and only then I would have responded to what I was feeling. I guess I wanted to protect my pride and dignity , more importantly, I didn’t want to be rejected. So I never went to Milano’s room nor phoned him.
Just as I got in bed, my phone rang. I picked up, it was Rethabile returning my call.
Nna: Hey rakgadi wa Kokoberries
Rethabile: Hello malome , what’s up?
Nna: Nothing much. I have been in mother city for a week. Work related. I was calling to ask you about your other sister Mrs Baloye. I have been trying to get hold of her but she is not responding.
Rethabile: Hee bathong Aus’ Noli, you didn’t know
Nna: Know what Rethabile?
Rethabile: The Baloyes flew to US last week Wednesday to visit Abuti Karabello....
Nna: What? I did not know.
Now it gets tricky. Why did the Baloyes sneak out of the country to visit Kevin? And why didn’t Reatli say anything? What about Kevin? Why didn’t he mention this when he called me on Monday? What were the Baloyes up to?
Seka batlwa se Ka bonwa. I thought to myself, these trip was clearly kept from me for a reason.
Question was: What reason was that..

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Write comments
25 September 2016 at 02:30 delete

Wow Makananelo, interesting indeed....keep them coming....both Rea and her hubby are dangerous and cannot be trusted....

Diary ya ga Obonolo
30 September 2016 at 14:01 delete

Thanks motho'aka