Mzansi Stories : Diary of a restless soul
Showing posts with label Diary of a restless soul. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Diary of a restless soul. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 27


Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 92

Insert 92
Vuyo drove to his place
The moment we walked in i went straight to the couch and sat
I was in so much pain and i felt so tired
Vuyo had taken my bags to the room
" ewe mama ndimfumene, noko she's still breathing even though she is not in great shape" vuyo said, he was on the phone
Him: ewe
Him: ulapha, ohk let me give her
He handed me the phone
Me: who is it
Him: mam' Nomcebo
I took the phone

Me: hello
Her: owh nono am so happy to hear your voice
Am glad you are safe
Me: am better mama all thanx to you, if you hadn't called vuyo i wouldn't be here
Thank you so much you are a life saver
Her: ah don't mention it dear, i just couldn't sit around and watch him kill you
Am just so disappointed in him
Just promise me that you wont stay, you don't deserve this
And don't ever go back cause i promise you nono he wont change and if he does change it would be for the worst not for the better
You are the most strong woman i have ever known
But even the strongest of person there's only so much they can take in
You dont wanna loose yourself in the midst of making a broken marriage to work
Me: owh mama you are just my strength, you are like a real mother to me
Thank you for closing the void of being motherless and for caring so much about my well being
Her: i am a mother and i could never allow my daughter to go through such hardship in the name of marriage
Me: i feel like a failure, i feel like some of this is part my fault
What do you do when the person who is suppose to stop you from crying is the one who is making you cry
Why does the road to happiness has to be so blurry and full of thorns
I wish everything can just be perfect
Her: i know nono bubomi ( its life), it is just so unfair and so unbalanced
But worry not, the pain luyolo has caused you will come back to him ten folds worse
It may seem impossible right now but believe me you will get through this
You will pull yourself together, held your head high and find your own happiness
Me: thank you mama, so where is IMI
Her: running around the house
Me: where are you guys at
Her: at your home in mamelodi
Me: ohk am just glad yall are safe, i hope Khitha didn't give you any problem
Her: she understands and is so kind and welcoming
Me: great then, i will see you guys when i get better
I just don't want Imi to see me in this condition
Her: its fine dear, just take your time
Me: bye mama greet everyone for me
Her: i will sisi, just take good care of yourself
Me: i will
I then gave Vuyo his phone back
He talked a bit then hung up
Vuyo: she is such a good women
Me: yeah she is my rock
Vuyo: you are lucky to have her,
So can i get you tea
Me: yep i am famished i can eat a cow
Vuyo: don't tell me he was staving you
ME: not at all, i just didn't wanna eat the food he brought
Looking at how much of a monster he has become i don't think he will hesitate poisoning me
Vuyo: am sorry he did this to you
Just thinking about him makes me more angry
Me: well i kinda brought this to myself
Vuyo: how
Me: i married him, he cheated on me before but i still went ahead and married him what was i expecting
You cant buy an apple and expect to get an orange inside
As the saying goes, You reap what you sow,
Vuyo: don't you dare do that to me, don't ever blame yourself
You didn't do this
that cow just didn't have balls to treat you like the angel That you are
you are like a precious stone, its surprising how my brother can be so blind
Me: ncooh thats sweet
Now can you please go get me something to eat before i die of hunger
Vuyo: geez shawty you look so thin to be calling on food this much
(He Teased squinting his eyes with his tongue stacked out)
Me: mxm nigga you gay
I threw a pillow at him
He dug and ran to the kitchen laughing and all
The following day, we woke up early
Vuyo had skipped work
He drove me to the police station
Yes you heard me right, i went to get my husband arrested for hitting me and holding me hostage
After the police station we drove to centurion
I met with my lawyer and he drew the divorce papers for me
We later went to the doctor
To get my bruises attended to
After the doctor's visit we got some take aways and a bottle of red wine
I actually bought it by force because vuyo didn't want me to buy it
Apparently i was gonna use alcohol as a scapegoat for my problems
His words not mine
We later drove home
We chilled the whole day watching movies and all
We were watching a comedy atleast today i could smile or even laugh
My bloated face was gone, my lips were back to normal although i still had a blue eye and a bit of bruises
I loved being with vuyo
Being with him made me forget about my situation
He made me laugh and i felt more normal
I actually felt like i mattered
Halfway through our movie my phone rang
Shit i left it on the charger the entire day
Before i could answer it the caller had already dropped
I browsed through it and i had dozen of missed calls from Dave, Luke and Sibu,
Still startled my phone rang
It was Luke
Me: hey boo whatsapp
LUU: Am still your best friend you know
Me: huh, an where is that coming from
LUU: how can you not tell me this Peto
So that sucker hit you and then after that he dumped you for that bilton girl
Unomokhwe wento ibhityileyo with a loose panty engu DK
Me: whaaaa... where did you get that
LUU: SO you didn't see it
Me: see what
Luu: girl where have you been living, under a rock or something
Damn check your facebook
Me: owh ohk let me check
I hung up
Vuyo: whats wrong
Me: its luke, apparently am famous on facebook
Vuyo: what are talking about
Me: am yet to find out
I quickly logged in my facebook
And i noticed the picture i was tagged in by Luyolo
I clicked it open and i couldn't believe what i saw

My bartered and swollen face was there with the caption
"When Love Is Gone"
Then another picmixed picture of me, luyolo in the middle then Dk on the left
The caption was
" an upgrade, she was his before and am his after
I love my man"
My heart bled, this was just alot to take in
I mean this girl has already won the battle so why advertise my pain
Why was she so eager to mock me and where the hell did she even get That picture
I read the comments and most people were busy throwing insults, saying how pathetic it was of her to post such pictures
Some had even inboxed me saying how much sorry they were about my situation
I logged out with a already sour mood
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Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 91

A day had passed and i was still locked like a prisoner
I had just woken up, it was an early morning, i just didn't know what time it was cause i had no phone
The noise that filled the house disturbed me, it felt like people were fighting
I badly yerned to know what was happening
I then heard glass breaking and shatering on the floor or wall
" rhaa uyinja mntaka tata, i didn't know you can be this cruel
Do you wanna kill her over a bitch 

I mean how can you mess with that thing, Dikeledi of all people
You and i know how much of a gold digger that girl is
Ai bra uSnayi" someone yelled
And judging from how loud his voice was it was clear that he was almost near my locked bedroom
" and what does any of this had to do with you, this is my house, Athe is my wife and i decide how to run my house and handle my wife
I think this mam nomcebo of a woman must go, why did she call you
She is busy poking her nose where it doesn't belong, she is leaving this minute" yolo answered on a high pitch
" can you open this door now or else i will break it down" vuyo said
could clearly hear his voice now that's how i knew it was him
Yolo: open what door, what do you want from my wife
Don't think i don't notice how you stare at her when ever you come here
Are you sleeping with her.
Vuyo: you can say anything for all i care
But all i know is that i must get in this room one way or another
So either you open the door or i break it down, either way its your call
Yolo: the nerve, who died and made you Athe's guardian
Vaya joe or you will not like what i will do to you
Vuyo: i think you are failing to realise that am not asking you to open, am telling you
Yolo: hee ye san vaya maan, khavaye ndoda
I then i heard the sounds of the door banging
" do you wanna kill him, leave him alone damiit" a female voice cried out

For a while the banging and moaning continued
After a long while someone unlocked the door
My eyes were already pasted there
I couldn't wait to see what was going on
The door swung open and vuyo rushed in looking all bloody
" omg you are bleeding, what are you doing here" i exclaimed in shock
Vuyo: relax its not my blood, and am here to get you out of this hell whole
Mam Nomcebo called me and told me what was happening
Me: where is she
Vuyo: safe with Imi, we need to get you out of here
I think my brother has gone crazy
I tried sitting up, my body and chest were still in pain
Vuyo: what the hell.. ( for a moment he stood speechless )
What did he do to you, can you walk or should i carry you
Me: its fine, i can walk, just get my suitcase in that closet its already packed
VUYO: owk
I got up from the bed as quickly as i could
Vuyo took my suitcase and held my hand with his other hand
we walked out of the room
We bumped into DK who was busy nursing a bleeding luyolo on the floor
" mxm barren bitch" Dk said scornfully
I just kept quiet and pretend not to hear her
"I will get you two arrested for assult
How can you even get your lover boy to assult my baby daddy
You have no shame dating brothers
You are just a low life slut" she continued
Me: says the trash who is pregnant for a married man
DK: IF only you can give luyolo the divorce he wants, why don't you wanna sign those papers
He doesn't love you anymore, just get that into your thick skull and sign the damn papers
me: owh so he lies to you
DK: he lies about what, he nolonger loves you
He has a new family to build now
A real family, he has a chance to raise his son now not someone else's baby
Just sign the papers so that he can marry the person he loves and adores which is me
Just let us and our baby be happy
She slowly brushed her tummy rubbing the pain in my face
DK: you should have seen how hard we fucked that day of the braai
He chose to sleep with me instead of you right under your nose
Akasakuthandi sisi just leave him for me
We made love almost the whole night
He screamed my name while you were in the next room
The problem is i know how to satisfy my man more that you ever will
After all you are only but half of a woman
Me: how typical and low can you get, how can you call getting fucked in the toilet making love
Such a shame
And wena ( POINTED AT LUYOLO) your ring is on the bed, you can go ahead and marry your floozy
You will hear from my lawyers soon
Vuyo lets go

DK: hamba vele bitch
" Atheee.. athe wait" yolo called out
I never turned back, i just held on tightly to vuyo's arm and we walked out
I was holding tears back
I was so hurt with what DK had said, i just couldn't cry infront of her
I refused to give her that much to boost about
We exited the house and went to vuyo's car
Me: my phone and laptop is still inside the house somewhere
Vuyo: don't worry, let me go get it
The minute vuyo left the hard lump on my throat melted
How did luyolo gave that girl so much power to disrespect me
Infact she knew everything about me
I felt like the the few years i wasted on this man was not worth it
I should have never returned the first time i left
I hope and prayed that someday DK experienced the same shame and pain she has brought into my home
How can you take pride on another woman's sweats
I build this house, i practically turned this house into a warm home now this girl is warming her way into my bed
But then karma is such a bitter bitch
Vuyo came out, i quickly wiped my tears
He got in the car, handed me my phones and laptop
He then drove out
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Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 90

Insert 90
I was still roughly packing my clothes in the suitcase when the door flew open again
It was luyolo
" owh still packing i see, but if i were you i would stop because you are not going anywhere
I am not about to loose you again
I love you dammit, why is it so hard for your pathetic skull to grasp that" he hissed, his teeth tightly pressed against each other
His vein popped more visible
I look at this figure that stood before me and i saw more of a monster in him than i ever did this past few years
" why did i ever get married to this guy, what did i even see in him" i wondered to myself
" did you hear what i just said" he said well it was more like yelling this time around
The yelling brought me back to life
I slowly stood up with an ounce of anger filling my veins with each struggle
By the time i had completely stood i was already boiling with anger
I faced him with my lips quirved
Me: look at me, do you not see, how could you not see how much you' ve broke me
How dare you take my heart right out of my chest and still expect me to be alive
He looked down avoiding eye contact
Me: you can't stand how my face look like do you,
And funny enough i also couldn't stand my self this morning
It took me an hour to recognize the person who was staring right back at me from that other side of the mirror
You painted this picture
This is your hand work
How am i....
" am sorry, its just that you drove me into this" he cut me
I looked at him in disbelief, did he just blamed me for dissembling my bones last night
Did he just gave lame excuse for hitting me
Me: wow, just know what am done
You are such an Ass, why are you even here right now
Ain't you suppose to be attending to your newly found wife
Him: you are my wife, well you still are legally
Me: and you have no idea how much i hate every bit of that
I regret ever getting married to a pig like you
He lifted his hand as to slap me, i didn't even move and inch
I was not afraid, i was ready to take another beating from him as long as i get to walk out of that door in the end
" gosssh why do you keep testing me" he hissed putting down his hand
Me: just let me go, is that too much to ask
Him: you are my wife and you are not going anywhere
Me: so you mean i should share my house with your pregnant side dish never just let me to take my daughter and leave you in peace
Him: hey sisi i think you need a wake up call,
She is not your daughter remember
IMINATHI is Khitha's daughter not yours, right now you should focus on having your own daughter
If you were able to get me a baby i wouldn't have gotten my side dish pregnant in the first place
Now just take a chill pill cause you are going nowhere
He opened a drawer took a key, then he went to the door took out the key
" what the hell are you doing" i screamed limping to the door
Him: what does it look like am doing, i told you that you are not going anywhere and i meant it
So you gonna stay in hear untill you decide to stop acting crazy
Me: you psycho, you can't do this
Him: least i forget
He took the two phones on top of the bed and i was almost at the door
I held on the door handle when he grabbed my weave and pulled me back, i painfully hit the floor
I screamed in pain but he never cared he just walked out locking the door behind him
I laid on that floor crying uncontrollably for a whole hour
I was locked in my room with no phone
I couldn't even escape because the windows had steelproofs
I just sat there feeling so helpless and inferior
A very big part of me wanted to end the pain i felt and the misery i was in
Suicidal thoughts started creeping in
I felt like the world had defeated me, i feel like i had no one
I stood up went to the bathroom
I took one of Yolo's razor
I went back to the room, sat on the floor again
Let out my one wrist, i was ready to cut it when a cute lil voice called me just outside my door
"Mama, mama vula" she knocked repeatedly
That angelic little voice alone was enough to bring me to my senses
What the hell was i about to do, how could i be a coward and so selfish
Why was i taking the easy way out
I mean if i die now i would be letting Imi down, i would be giving luyolo a win in a silver platter
I would be letting him get away with hurting me

I tossed the razor away got on the bed and tried falling asleep
I must have have fallen asleep cause i woke still alone in the room
On top of my sideboard was a plate of food and a bottle of water with an empty glass
And some few pills with the ointment i figured those were for my bruises
I sat up
I didn't feel hungry so i just drank water
Then took the pain meds
The meds drugged me right back to sleep
I woke up in the late afternoon i quickly went to pee
Then walked back to the bathroom
I quickly remembered that i had a laptop
And i could use it to send an email to my brother
So i went to where i keep the laptop and it was gone
The bag was gone, luyolo must have taken it while i was asleep
Cause earlier he didn't take it
Its times like this where you wish you had a secret emergency phone stashed somewhere in your room
If only i knew that i might end up being a prison in my own room, kept captive by my own husband then i would have had one
I wondered what lie did he fabricate about why i was locked in my room
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Thursday, July 14


Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 89

insert 89
i woke up the next morning not able to move or even turn
luyolo was nowhere near me
i decided to stay in bed
i called the office and told them i was sick
mam nomcebo knocked lightly on my door and i ordered her to come in
she entered still in her nighty
"owh sisi did he hurt you" she said running to my side of the bed
her: yhuu owh bawo yintoni ngomyenakho
we need to get him arrested
he wanted to kill you
look at you
she looked at me sadly
i tried answering her, but opening my mouth was just as bigger mission
my lips were on fire
my cheek bones felt like they were broken
"am ohky,,,,,you don't have to worry" i managed to say
her: we need to get you to the hospital sisi
me: no, just get me pain meds and oils to clean myself from the pharmacy
i don't need a hospital
her: but sisi...
me: please mama
her: don't get me wrong but i need to say this
i don't think your husband loves you anymore
i mean a man who loves you will never lift a finger on you
even worse beat you to this pulp
i don't care how much you may have wronged him
a man should never lift a hand on his wife
i think now its getting out of hand
i was already in tears
what mam nomcebo said made sense
luyolo was no longer mine
her: please don't cry sisi
i didnt mean to make you cry
me: luyolo has disrespected me in more ways than one
he took away my womanhood
he took away my dignity
mama luyolo brought his mistress into my house
her: intoniiii (she clapped once in shocked)
aibo sisi, who?
who is this mistress and how can he ridicule you like that
rhaaa uyanya umyenakho shem
me: its some girl named DIKELEDI
she was here the weekend of the party
her: the nerve of your man
how can he disrespect you like that
ai sisi this is a lot to handle
me: whats worse is the fact that the girl is pregnant
with his child
her: iyhuu you have it hard shem
how can one person go through such hardship
why is he disgracing you like this
i prayed things never works out between him and the girl she got
we kept talking with mam nomcebo
later she left my room with the money for my meds

i got out of the bed
went to take a quick warm shower which actually took longer than how it was suppose to
i patted myself dry
and limped to my room holding the wall for balance
i stood infront of the mirror
dropped the towel
my chest had visible red bruises
my chest was really damaged
even breathing air seemed impossible
i just looked like a hot mess
my left eye was also closed
my lips were swollen
and my cheeks were worse
my face was just disorientated
my whole body was just something else
i wondered why was all this happening to me
when was i gonna find peace
why was i born to suffer
this burden was much harder for me to carry
i hated DK for doing this
how can a woman rejoice in another woman's tears
how can she find pleasure in my pain
i mean she was also a fellow woman like me
she was suppose to consider my feelings before tearing every bit of myself esteem into shreds
GOD please hear my pain and end this suffering
was this really a price to pay for being in a marriage
then i guess marriage was not for me
i was just not strong enough
later that day i was still in my room
my husband came back home caring two big suitcases
i watched as he entered the room dragging those suitcases
"we need to talk" he said searching for something in the closet
i never responded
" i think IMI is a grown girl now, we don't need a nanny" he continued
me: what now
him: we need to release mam nomcebo from her duties
besides imi is now old
me: and where is that coming from
him: I need the room, DK needs a place to stay
her parents kicked her out and she has no place to stay
and since she is caring my baby i think its only fair i let her stay here
me: am sorry what, you are bringing your pregnant roll on into my house
and who did you discuss that with?
Him: Athe please don't make this a big deal
you always make everything about you
just stop being selfish for once
am doing this for the sake of the baby
i can never allow my baby to be born in the streets
me: so am selfish,
you mean that i should keep quiet while you plan on bringing another woman into my house
really now, should i laugh and clap for you
him: you should be considerate, the is an innocent baby involve her
you need to stop being heartless for once
and think about the well being of my unborn child
i paused
i could feel the hard lump in my throat

me: why are hurting me like this
is it because of the i cant give you the baby you badly want
has your love for me disappeared
am i not the girl you fell inlove with anymore
what changed
he looked at me and clicked his tongue
me: at least you should respect me enough to talk to me first before making major decision
him: as if you are easy to talk to
me: so who's bags are those
him: have i not been clear, DK is moving in with us
me: so she is already here
Him: yes she is in the lounge, that's why you should talk with mam nomcebo ASAP
so luyolo forgot my conditions
i had told him that next time he takes decision he must consult with me first
but it seems like he is not ready to do that
i stood up
took of the ring from my left finger and placed it on top of the bed
him: and then
me: fine i will take mam nomcebo and imi with me
we are leaving your house this minute
him: but i didn't say you should leave
me: you didn't need to, bringing your sister her was the first sign that i wasn't wanted
now having your mistress has just proved how much i am not needed here so am leaving
" owh and i want a divorce so you will hear from my lawyer" i said taking out my clothes in the closet
him: a divorce, you must be crazy
i will never give you that divorce
over my dead body!!!!!
then he walked out slamming the door behind him
i just continued packing my clothes
i was leaving
and for good this time
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Saturday, July 9


Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 88

few weeks had passed by
with it the moods of my husband
he was like a new born baby, one minute happy and the next so fussy and angry
besides his anger, was forever quarrels
i stared at the mirror for the longest time
it was already 3:00 am in the morning and my husband was still not yet home
i threw myself in the bed and wiped my tears
i could hear her sister snoring in the other room
what was happening to my home

not so long ago we were so happily inlove
everything seemed fine
if only i were able to give him the baby he badly desires
i threw the positive pregnancy test against the wall
it hurts so much, it should be me
this was suppose to be mine
i wail even a bit louder placing my hand on my face
right then my bedroom door flew open
my husband walked
i could smell the cheap perfume from miles away
i slowly wiped my tears
as if he had done nothing wrong he walked up to me and kissed my forehead
"sorry am late" he said coldly
i look at him
and i saw no trace of the man i married
i had no knowledge of this stranger who has just walked in my room
i think the anger i had swallowed me whole so i just released one hot slap in his face
Him: what the hell
he looked puzzled
fine wrinkles formed on his forehead
me: how dare you
how can you disrespect me like this
you come home drowning in cheap perfume
and tell me you sorry you are late
who the hell do you think i am
i see you must mistake me for a fool
he didn't say a word
instead he loosened his tie
before i knew it he came to me
held me roughly by my nighty
he pinned me against the wall
then he delivered more beatings than my tiny body could handle

i screamed and cried in pain as my husband kicked me mercilessly
i literally felt my bones shattering into tiny pieces
mam'nomcebo hit harder at the door
asking yolo to open up
but yolo wouldn't barge
infact its like he didn't hear her
he just continued beating me
tried as hard covering my face
"bitch, am gonna teach you a thing or two about manners today
i see you have gotten used of the idea of just slapping me
now fight back, since you have such energy fight back dammit" he shouted
i was busy screaming and asking for forgiveness whilst still on the floor
his foot stamped harder at my stomach
i was so sure that my husband wanted to kill me that morning
to be continued
‪#‎sorry‬ for the mini skirt guys i have lost the phone i use for facebook
please bear with me

i was so tired of screaming
my whole body was in pain
just for few minutes he stopped
i lay there still
i was so sure that my bones were broken
i took a deep breathe
but breathing alone was just as painful
him: look at what you made me do now
i laughed at that statement sarcastically
he was so unbelievable
me: what i made you do, really
are you kidding me
him: athe you are so disrespectful and hot headed
you talk to much
you raise your hand at me
its like you have forgotten that i am the man of this house
me: how can i respect a man who doesn't respect himself
you don't respect our marriage
you are a cheater and an excuse of a man
i can smell her perfume on your clothes
just save me the heartache and tell me who is she
him: who is who
me: the woman you are coming from
who is she
is she the one whom you impregnated
does she even know that you are married
does she know that she is a home wrecker
mmh who is she yolo
and why is she so determined to take my happiness away from me
i paused
tried to sit up but my torn ribs wouldn't let me
tears fell continuously
not because of the physical pain but because the emotional pain was more intense
him: am not cheating on you or even got someone pregnant
were did you get such nonsense
me: yolo i am not a fool, i have eyes
i saw all the changes
the morning sickness you have been having
and your forever changing moods swings
please just tell me who is she
him: well you are right i did get someone pregnant
and it was just a mistake
me: mistake,,really now
a mistake is where by you step on someone foot accidentally
not this
do you have any idea of what you've just did
i sobbed from the top of my voice
i felt the dagger Peirce through my heart
this man was killing me alive
i always knew that he got someone pregnant but i was just not ready to hear him say it
me: who is she
those were the only words i had managed to say
he breathed heavily
"am so sorry i have never meant to hurt you
i was so desperate for a child and i got lost in the moment" he said
me: save me the speech
i need not to know of the details
just tell me who is she
he looked away
me: omg the pregnancy test
how did it get to my house
did you bring her here
did you bring your whore in my house yolo
when....and why, why bring her in my house
who the hell is she, do i know her
he nodded his head
him: i never meant to break your heart like this
me: just tell me the name dammit
him: its...uhm..Dikel..uh..its DK
ME: what!!!?
did i hear you right, is that the same DK who was at the braai
him: yyyyess
me: no, no i refuse
i refuse to admit that I've been a fool
owh my GOD what is happening in my house
nooo please you have to be kidding
this is a dream, its just a horrible nightmare i need to wake and everything will be alright
him: am so sor...
me: save it
i cried so much
this couldn't be real
i just didn't want it to be real, the must be a logic explanation
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Thursday, June 30


Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 87

insert 87
i woke up the following morning
i felt a bit down
i got out of bed went to take a quick shower
i came back to a tray of a full english breakfast
i wore a short black dress and sleepers
" you woke up early, i wanted to bring you breakfast in bed" yolo said as soon as he entered
me: so this is mine
yolo: yep, sorry there's no egg
i couldn't make them
i can't stand the smell
me: since when do eggs smell get to you
Yolo: don't know
me: owh, anyway thanx for the breakfast
Yolo: no need to thank me;
i just want to say am sorry about yesterday
it was wrong of me to lay my hand on you
ME: Its ohk, i also slapped you back and am sorry too
Yolo: i guess i deserved that, considering how much of a jerk i was to vuyo and everyone else
Me: do you wanna talk about it
Yolo: i...
He ran to the bathroom
i heard him vommiting so i also went to the bathroom
"are you ohk" i asked leaning near the bathroom door
"i don't know, i don't feel well
i guess ndine nyongo" he answered getting up from the toilet
me: you should clean yourself then
YOLO: Yeah i will
he washed his sweaty face and mouth
then exited the bathroom and i followed behind him
he seemed a bit weak and i was starting to get worried
me: you don't look fine, should i skip church
YOLO: no don't, am fine don't get yourself worked out
me: ohk then
i sat down and indulged on my breakfast
i had asked yolo to eat with me but he said that he was not hungry
after eating
i took the dishes to the kitchen
i cleaned the house
then cooked rice, meat and salads
by then Mam'Nomcebo was already feeding Imi
after that she went to bathe her
Mandy woke up cleaned her room and the veranda
she also ate breakfast
me: you will make your famous beans salad right
Mandy: yep can you take out the kidneys for me please
Me: i've already done that
Mandy: let me start then so that i can get ready for church
she prepared the salad while i finished of with everything
after we were done we both went to get ready for church
Luyolo had went back to bed
so i let him be
i hoped that he will be better when we get back
I wore my pencil skirt and blue silk top
with my wedge
i tied my weave neatly then applied minimum make up in my face
me: babe
yolo: mhmm(with his eyes closed)
Me: your food is in the microwave
you will find it there when you are hungry
and please do eat, you look weak
yolo: don't stress yourself love
i will be fine
me: ohk then
we kissed briefly
"will see you when we get back then" i said
Yolo: k, enjoy the service and stop worrying about me
me: i will try
i exited the house
the others followed shortly behind me
we first dropped mandy at her church because she attended a different church, which was not far from our church
after dropping mandy
we drove to our church which was 5 minutes away from mandy's
we waited in the car
because we were a bit early
after 15 minutes we went inside
the service started
we sang, waiting for pastor Smith who came in 30 minutes later
all in all the service was just great
it was great rejoycing with the LORD
I even prayed for my husband to get better
after the church i gave mam'nomcebo the car key
then i went to pastor smith i needed to talk to him about my husband sudden change of behaviour
he was in the church office
i knocked once and he ordered me to come in
Pastor: owh miss Mdingi its you,
you can take a seat
me: thank you
pastor: i hope there's no problem
me: well am here because of my husband
i think He is seeing another woman
and my biggest fear is that he may have gotten the woman pregnant
pastor smith kept quiet a bit
he didn't seem phased about what i just said
"i saw this coming" he finally said
me: what do you mean pastor
pastor: remember the first day you came to my church and i had a revelation about you
Me: yes i remember
Pastor: i told you that your biggest battle is yet to come
and this is it, am afraid this may make or break your mariage
i warned your husband about this
i thought i could stop it
Me: pastor what should i do
who is this young woman
who is determined to break my home
Pastor: you need to trust in the LORD
and no, i don't know who the girl is
ME: pastor is my sister inlaw involved in this
does she has a hand in this
PASTOR: no, she is not..
your husband's desparation for a child drove him to this
he couldn't wait, he failed to be patient
we continued talking with pastor smith
we then prayed briefly before i left his office
i went to my car
mam'nomcebo and imi were already in
me: i hope i didn't keep you guys waiting for to long
her: oh no sisi, not at all
Imi: mina funa i chips
me: don't worry, i will buy them for you
lets go get aunty Mandy first
Imi: solanda u Mammy neh
ME: yep nana
i drove to mandy's church
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Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 86

insert 86
Sibu came out a while later
we went to give his friends the booze
then He offered to walk me home
"i guess i will see you monday at work ke MR MD" i said as soon as we reached my gate
"i guess so, although i wish you could tell me whats bothering you" he said
me: i don't know how many times must i say this am f....
Sibu: you fine, i get it
i just wish i didn't know you as much as i do
i can literally see right through you
ME: Am fine you don't have to worry about me
Sibu: only if it was that easy
ME: just try
SIBU: OHK sharp then see you monday
ME: sure
he walked back to the park
while i went in the house
the guys were back
they were chilling outside near the pool drinking
even vivian was back
the only person who didn't come back was DK
i just stood in the kitchen and watched them through the window
they were laughing and loud
they didn't seem to have any stress
it was evident that they were already tipsy
i finally gained the courage to walk out
Luu: biiatch uvelaphi
i've searched for you everywhere
ME: why were you looking for me
LUU: because you looked troubled earlier
ME: am fine, i just took a walk
i needed some fresh air
LUU: Shame the hangover had you real bad neh
ME: yeah
VUYO: your stuff is in the microwave
ME: my stuff??
Vuyo: yeah your wings, i hope they are enough
ME: Thank you hey, i've already forgotten about those
YOLO: so the special person is my wife
ME: am sorry whaat?
YOLO.: am talking to vuyo not you
me: owh
VUYO: AI bro don't make a mountain out of this morehill
YOLO: So am now exxagarating,
you bought my wife stuff and you expect me to be fine
are you guys fucking
everybody kept quiet
VUYO: bro you need to calm down
you've been at everybody's throat since morning
what's wrong with you
YOLO: do i seem like someone who has a problem
VUYO: no you're just acting like a bitch thats all
Luyolo stood up hurridly, flew to where vuyo
luckily Dave held him before he could go any further
DAVE: Man you need to calm down
you can't be fighting your own brother
pull youself together
yolo just gave Vuyo a death stare
pull out of my brother's grip
he fixed himself
clicked his tongue in annoyance
he walked away with
His veins popping through his forehead
KHITHA: and then, what was that
i shruggled my shoulders also stunned at my husband behaviour
which by the way was uncalled for
LUU: AI Shem something is definatly wrong with your hubby
MANDY: HE almost cut my head off when i talked to him earlier on
LUU: you not the only one
i also asked him where Athe was
but he told me that He is not Athe keeper
VUYO: Something is definatly wrong with him
LUZUKO: Maybe he is tired
DAVE: But he did go to bed mos yesterday
i was half asleep when he exited the lounge
he came back around 8:30 this morning
i went to the kitchen, my mind more confused than ever
how come Dave say my husband went to bed
but i was sure that he never came to bed
or was i that drunk
if so then why did he say he slept in the lounge when i asked him earlier
Something was definatly wrong somewhere
i took out my wings
placed them in a glass bowl
and warmed them up
when they were ready i sat down and ate
i never drank again that day
Yolo was nowhere to be found
around 22:30 pm everbody left
only Mandy, Mam'nomcebo, IMI and I remained
YOLO was still not yet back
we washed the dishes
then everybody went to sleep
i was woken up by cold hands touching me
i realised that it was Luyolo
he had just came in
i checked the time on my phone
and it was just after 00:30 am
"stop it" i said removing his hands from me
YOLO: so you don't want me to touch you anymore
ME: your hands are cold
and besides i am not the one who sent you out all night
YOLO: MXM whatever
He face the other way
"owh and your girlfriend called me today
i just thought you should know" i said calmly
YOLO: wh.... which girlfriend are you talking about
ME: The same girl who left those pregnancy test in my drawer
he kept quiet a bit
" what are you really talking about" he said
i could clearly sense the panic in his voice
i decided to play dump and i remain as calm as i possibly could
Me: i don't know, what do you think am talking about
Yolo: how should i know while you not even making any sense
me: so you mean to tell me that you are not cheating on me
YOLO: no am not
Me: then do you mind telling me where you slept last night
he coughed profusely
my question surely did caught him of guard
me: am still all ears
YOLO: I told you in the morning mos
Me: what did you tell me
YOLO: that i slept in the lounge
me: and is that suppose to be the truth
or its what you want me to hear
YOLO: I have told you the truth
whether you believe me or not, its not my business
now if you don't mind i would like to have some sleep
he covered himself with the blanket
i kept quiet
tears just fell sideways hitting the pillow
i never cried so loud,i just let them fall freely
The truth is I was deeply hurt
But a piece of me didn't wanna believe that luyolo could hurt me like that
I meant I've known this guy my whole life
He is the most kindest person I've ever known
Right then his phone beeped alerting and incoming text
He took it quickly
Few minutes after, he started writing something he had the most geniune smile ever
I longed to know who he was writing to
And who that text message was from
I guess he was in whatsapp because his phone kept on beeping non stop
The sound of it alone was enough to annoy my whole being
I just felt so disrespected
"I think you should go chat with your bitch outside" I blurted out in anger
Yolo: what did you just say
Me: I think you heard me, you are such an ass you know
You accused vuyo of sleeping with me because you are also doing it isn't it
You are a man whore
Before I knew it a hot slap landed on my cheek
I blinked rapidly in disbelieve
Did I just got slapped, I stayed still letting the hotness sink in
My cheek was really burning no lie
But the stubbornness in me refused to allow defeat
With all I strenght I had left within me
I slapped him right back
"You have nerves neh" he said with his hand on his cheek
Me: I am not your punching bag, you will not slap me and expect me to be quiet
Yolo: you insulted me what did you expect
Me: I didn't insult you, I merely stated the fact
Yolo: and I told you that am not cheating on you
What do you want me to do, for you to believe me
You know how much I love you how can you even suggest that I can do such thing
He talked with a straight face, he was so good at lyng I think he was starting to believe his own lies
i wondered why he was lying to me, even worse why did he think that I was so stupid not to see
I Kept quiet and faced the other way
Deep down I knew that I was loosing him
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Monday, June 27


Diary of a restless soul Season 2 Insert 85

insert 85
I left my room in a bad mood
walked to the kitchen
i went straight to the fridge took out one dumpy, gulp it all at once
Luu: aibo peto whats wrong
i put down the bottle and everyone was staring at me in amazement
i wanted to ask them about the test but i couldn't stand to embarrass myself like that
i didn't wanna make my self a laughing stock

i longed to answer luke but i felt tears threatning my eyes
so i placed the bottle on the table and exited the house
i just needed to get some fresh air
before i knew it i was almost at the park
i went to a chair and sat down
why was this happening
and whose pregnancy test was that
and why would somebody even leave her pregnancy test in my drawer
i buried my face in my hands and let the tears fall freely
"hey you" A voice enterrupted my sobbing moment
i was so broken that i didn't even recognise the voice
The person sat besides me and brushed my back
somehow the scent of his cologne was familiar to me
i wiped my tears in descret
then lifted my face of shame as to see who was this misterious stranger
"owh my god you really are crying" he said
Me: no am not, and what are you doing here Sibulele
Sibu: i was with my friends over there(he pointed at some group of guys who were chilling under a tree) when i saw you sitting here
you looked troubled
me: i mean what are you doing in pretoria are you still busy with your deal
Sibu: yep and it went through
meet your new shareholder and MD
me: what do you mean my new shareholder and MD
Sibu: didn't Dave tell you
we signed a contract two days ago
i will be starting monday morning
me: you kidding me right
Sibu: not at all
Me: wow congratulations Sir
Sibu: thanx, we are celebrating with my friends over there
Don't you wanna join us
Me: am sorry i have to pass
am not in any mood for crowds
there was a bit of quietness


Sibu: you still didn't tell me why you were crying
me: i told you that am fine
Sibu: you know you can't fool me right
Me: and who said i was fooling you
Sibu: i know you nana
Me: i guess you use to know me,
people change and they grow
Sibu: i know that, but you are still My Athe and i know you enough to tell that you were crying
me: Fine, i just wanted to let off some steam
Sibu: trouble in paradise
Me: No, i just had a terrible morning thats all
Sibu: i see, but you know bottling things inside is not healthy
Me: and i am not bottling anything
Sibu: since you fine then i bet you wont mind taking a walk with me
Me: where are you going
Sibu: tops, my friends need some refill
Me: fine lets go
He held my hand and pulled me up
then we walked to Tops since it was a walking distance from the park
"your hands are still soft and small" he said
i remembered that he was holding my hand
so i yanked it out
"and you are still as sturbbon" he said
me: Am not sturbbon
Sibu: of'cos you are, you are the most sturbbon girl i ever met
me: well i don't think i am
Sibu: thats why i always say i know you more than you know yourself BHABHA
Me: and i thought you will be married by now
Sibu: i will get married as soon as i find the lady i lost
Me: lol you are not getting younger yaz,
i hope you remember that
Sibu: i know but the person am waiting for is worth the wait
Me: yeah right its either that or you gay
Sibu: we both know am straight as a Ruler
Me: you just enjoy being a bachelor neh
Sibu: i guess so
Me: but you are right, don't rush into marriage
we don't want you breaking some poor girl's heart
marriage is really a deal breaker
Sibu: well if you are with who you suppose to be with then its not
It only hurts if you with the wrong person
Me: i don't think there is a wrong or right person
there's just no such thing
Sibu: then you haven't love whole heartedly yet
Me: trust me i have, i love Luyolo whole heartedly there's no doubt about that
anyway what do you know about loving whole heartedly
you are a bachelor for God Sake
SIBU: i know a whole lot than you think
Me: enlighten me
Sibu: i will, just not now, maybe someday
Me: ohk then
we got to Tops he got in
i remained outside answering my ringing phone
it was a number i didn't know
i answered in a calm voice
Me: hi
caller: jah girl, i hope you got the parcel
me: what parcel, and who are you
caller: someone who has something that you will never have
Me: what are you talking about
caller: if i were you i would start packing
unless you can settle for being second best
or maybe you don't mind Sharing
cause i sure don't
Me: Sisi do you know who you are talking to
caller: Yeah the So-called mrs Mdingi
although am not even sure that you deserve the Tittle
Me: and who are you
caller: don't worry you will meet me soon enough
that test is just the begining
Me: what the he.....
She had already dropped the call on me
i didn't even recognise her voice
right there i was shattered again
what kind of a woman who calls another woman and scorn her
am sure this girl didn't even know me
yet here she was calling me and boosting about lord knows what
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